Vaudevillain

Chapter 194: Parading Around

Instructions given, Dr. Zlo turned back to his Zlomobile.

"Get in, Cass," the villain said. "It's time to head to the race!"

Cass nervously entered the vehicle, sitting in the passenger's seat while Dr. Zlo entered the driver's. The villain pressed a button on the dashboard, a taped-on garage opener he placed beforehand, and activated the elevator under the Zlomobile. The car spun upward, like an item in a showroom, until it reached the garage above. From there, Dylan eased the car out the door, taking note of the surrounding players and NPCs.

Dr. Zlo had crafted a crowd for the event, a group of eager robots that were ready to cheer on all the competitors. Most sat outside each player's lair, the crowd planning to follow as the racers moved toward the track.

"Cass, take the wheel for a moment," Dr. Zlo said.

The villain opened the door and rocketed out to fly above his Zlomobile. Cass, ever the loyal butler, moved over into the driver's seat and made sure the car followed. Dr. Zlo acted like royalty, waving imperiously to the masses below. The NPCs responded with mad cheering, throwing streamers and confetti in their excitement.

"Come now!" Dr. Zlo boomed. "Save that for when I win!"

The Zlomobile made its way down the street, stopping at a large freight elevator situated near the central skyscraper. The crowd followed behind, a few lucky NPCs squeezing into the elevator with the villain. Dr. Zlo made sure to keep them away from his newest invention. There was always the chance someone wanted to sabotage his car before the race. It was the kind of dastardly deed Dr. Zlo would try to do.

The freight elevator opened to another crowd, this one a mix of players and NPCs as they waited for the various heroes and villains to arrive. Dr. Zlo waved as he passed by the crowd, making his way toward the PVP arena where the race would start.

Oro joined up along the way. The hero's vehicle was a golden sports car, the shine mimicking the hero's complexion. It resembled an old Corvette convertible, sporting a wider frame and smoother curves. The top folded upward as the car came close, stowing in the back and revealing the golden hero in the driver's seat.

"You call that a racer!" Oro taunted Dr. Zlo as the two met. "My grandma could build something better!"

"Ah, Oro. Always with the jokes," Dr. Zlo bowed. "I see you brought something from a pawn shop. What? Hero work not paying the big bucks?"

Dr. Zlo scanned the car, admiring the gold paint job and sturdy construction. He thought he spied a few compartments in the back, but it was hard to tell with all the gold paint glinting in the light.

"As if," Oro answered, pressing a button on the car. Two hidden guns popped out of the headlights, glittering a deadly shade of red. "Disintegration cannons," the hero explained. "Specifically designed to break all types of metals."

"You'll have to do better than that!" Dr. Zlo growled. "My Zlomobile won't fall for such simplistic weapons!"

Dr. Zlo, in turn, commanded Cass to activate the forcefield, not wanting to lose to Oro.

"Oh, don't worry, I've got plenty more where that came from," the hero answered as he saw the glittering protection encircle the car.

"And none of it can hold a candle to my machine," Sweet Dream said, emerging from a side alley.

The villainess patted her car, running a hand over the hard candy frame, "This here is the strongest jawbreaker candy known to man. And the licorice tires aren't nothing to scoff at neither."

Dr. Zlo looked down at the car, seeing the black wheels as they spun. Sweet Dream's minions, the Licor-icks, crawled around the frame like spiders, periodically placing gobs of chocolate on joints. Hatbots jumped around on the minion's heads, the tiny robots beeping excitedly. A bubbling sound rose from the back, and Dr. Zlo's eyes widened as he saw a cauldron of boiling sugar.

"Well, you've certainly got a theme going," Dr. Zlo spoke.

"I thought it was appropriate," Sweet Dream said. "You did mention this was like Zany Races. I'm thinking I'll call it the Candy Crusher."

"No offense, but that doesn't look like it could crush anything," Oro commented.

Sweet Dream snapped her fingers. The Licor-icks jumped, crawling into the vehicle and pulling out massive jawbreakers connected by taffy chains.

"This enough for ya?" Sweet Dream asked. The Licor-icks started to spin the jawbreakers, the ends cracking against the road and sending chips of asphalt into the air.

"I stand corrected," Oro answered, a bit apprehensive of the weapon.

"Dudes! Those cars are sweet!" Riptide yelled.

The three turned to see Riptide standing on a boat car, the ends modified to resemble a surfboard. A shark's mouth enveloped the windshield, Riptide and his minion G.W. sitting in the seats. Riptide stood as he saw his companions jumping over the shark-mouth windshield and onto the ocean-colored surfboard frame.

"I should have known you would make a surfboard," Dr. Zlo answered. "You certainly have a one-track mind."

"Of course, dude!" Riptide laughed. "My Undercurrent is going to wreck the competition!"

"You forget who you're dealing with!" Dr. Zlo roared. He spun in place, deactivating his shoes and landing in front of the villain, "I am Dr. Zlo! The greatest criminal mastermind!"

"Yeah, dude," Riptide answered with a smirk, "but can you race?"

"Of course I can race you saltwater swine," Dr. Zlo sniffed. "The question is, can you keep up?"

"Old Undercurrent has a few tricks up her sleeve, dude," Riptide answered, patting the car gently. "You'll see when the race starts."

"If you think for a second that your unaerodynamic surfboard is going to pass my sophisticated design, you got another thing coming," Jack remarked, joining up with the group.

Dr. Zlo turned to see his friend driving in a sleek formula one car. The vehicle hung low to the ground, almost kissing it with its chassis as it rumbled forward. The frame was an orange cream, the color turning a dark red as it reached the ground. Unlike typical formula one cars, this one's wheels were covered with a protective frame. A small spoiler rested in the back. The edges tipped blue.

"Did you only go for speed?" Sweet Dream asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, there's more in here than you think," Jack answered. "I'm going to run circles around all of you."

"You can try," Oro answered, crossing his arms. "But what'll you do when I blast your tires right off?"

Jack pulled an item out of her inventory, "That won't be a problem. You can't beat a portable pit crew."

"I can if I never get hit!" Dr. Zlo laughed. "And none of you are going to come close!"

"We'll see about that, dude," Riptide answered as the party reached the PVP arena.

Dylan whistled, impressed, as he entered the arena. He'd designed it to resemble a Roman coliseum, but the man never expected the amount of flair the players would add to it. Banners of different groups rested on the arches, advertising their team's logos. Several hooked together scoreboards hung around the inside, promoting win/loss streaks and handing out information. Small groups of players faced off in the arena itself, getting one last fight in before the place became a racetrack. Others stood in front of what looked to be training robots, honing their skills on the robotic nemeses.

The crowds of NPCs and players filed into the stadium seats, Dr. Zlo and his companions moving towards the designated starting line. As the villain looked around, he saw Mabel up in the seats, a group of Jacques standing nearby. As they made eye contact, Mabel nodded, signaling the traps were still ready.

Dr. Zlo smirked. Soon he would show these simpletons who the real winner was.

Dr. Zlo had Cass move the car to his designated position, next to Oro and behind Sweet Dream. Position placements were randomly decided, something Dr. Zlo protested but ultimately failed to change. Dextra had said that it would take up too much time to hold a time trial for each racer. What with the guest list being so large.

Before Dr. Zlo could get a look at the rest of the competition, Dextra appeared in one of the private booths. The screens all changed to focus on the player, gaining everyone's attention.

"Good evening all!" Dextra started. "Welcome to the first Menagerie Grand Prix! Hosted by the villainous Dr. Zlo!"

The screens flicked over to the villain, who removed his top hat in a deep bow.

"Dr. Zlo is an inventor of great renown, as many of you must know, and he recently crafted a new vehicle that he claims is the fastest in the world! Of course, we all know a villain's claims are rarely backed up by fact, which is why the villainous Dr. Zlo is holding this great race! He will be up against a bevy of heroes and villains in Menagerie and many from outside as well!"

Dextra paused to take a breath, "This grand sprint will take the racers around the city of Skyline. Starting here in the PVP arena, the players will make their way toward Skyline Tower, navigating the winding roads. Once there, the racers will circle the tower once and make their way toward our resident crafting district. Our crafters erected a special checkpoint in the area, so be on your toes! Once they reach that checkpoint, the players will make their way back to Skyline Tower, then down the home stretch back to our PVP arena!"

The crowd cheered and clapped enthusiastically. Dextra waited for it to die down before continuing, "The first racer to make it back will receive the grand prize, ten whole grams of Phlebotinium! Second place receives three grams, and third place will get one gram."

The crowd cheered more, and the racers' eyes sparkled with greed. Ten grams of Phlebotinium would let them buy almost anything they wanted and allow them to power up significantly! Suddenly, the others were eyeing each other, the joking spirit replaced by competitiveness.