Vaudevillain

Chapter 169: Secret Agent Villain

Flying to the top of the float wasn't hard. Apparently, Tractus never thought anyone would ever try and infiltrate the city through clandestine means. Dylan wondered if it was intentional, Vert making a way for villains to enter without trouble. Of course, if the player wanted to be smart about it, he would don his secret identity and stroll on inside.

The things Dylan did to play a villain.

Dr. Zlo landed on the surface of Tractus, deactivating his rocket shoes. They hissed slightly from the impact with the ground. Stealthily, Dr. Zlo looked around the streets for something to tie the rope to.

As he moved, Dylan decided to recreate the stealthy movement of the iconic villains. Dr. Zlo crouched slightly, holding his hands out in front like he was a dinosaur. Once he spotted a pole to tie the rope on, the villain started to make long, quiet steps over to it. In his mind, Dylan hummed the Mission Improbable theme. For that added effect.

It was something Dylan would only ever do when no one was watching. The man would usually be too embarrassed if anyone caught him in the act. But he had always wanted to try and act like the more cartoonish villains once or twice. They had this larger than life quality that seemed to be missing in superhero stories nowadays.

Once he reached the post, Dylan stopped his sneaking and quickly tied the rope into a simple double knot. He tugged on it when he finished, testing the rope's strength. It seemed to hold up.

Satisfied, Dr. Zlo brought the rope to the edge of the city and tossed it over the edge. It sailed down out of sight, a soft splash coming back up a second later. There, that would give his minions a way up. Now all Dr. Zlo had to do was wait.

Of course, no self-respecting villain would wait for his minions to arrive by standing next to the rope. No, Dr. Zlo had to greet his minions in style, preferably with a defeated hero under his shoes. The villain looked around, hopeful. Turing had mentioned heroes occasionally patrolled the area.

All Dr. Zlo saw was pristine white buildings and concrete streets. There wasn't even a piece of litter wafting through the air to add effect.

"This place is like a ghost town," Dr. Zlo commented.

Turing jumped out at that moment, bringing the phone up where Dr. Zlo could see it.

Tractus has few citizens, and most live in the center of the city, Turing explained.

"I see," Dr. Zlo said.

Well, that probably ruined his chances of finding a hero to beat. The villain would need some other way to greet his minions. Perhaps he could commandeer one of these empty buildings as a forward base.

Deciding on the idea with a nod, Dr. Zlo picked a building at random and made his way to the door. As he moved closer, Dr. Zlo noticed the buildings weren't quite the solid white he thought they were. Shades of pearl mixed in with the white, swirling around in hypnotic patterns if one looked closely. It was a nice touch to break up the monotony that white brought, and Dylan applauded whoever thought of the idea.

Dr. Zlo grabbed the handle on the door and threw it open, readying his laser in case of an ambush. Silence greeted him: silence and dust. Dr. Zlo sneezed, once again grateful his minions weren't around quite yet.

Dylan maneuvered through the empty building with the grace of a video gamer. That is to say; he opened every door and cabinet he found in the hope that he might find something special. All he received for his trouble was more dust. On the bright side, that meant no heroes to ruin his day.

Dr. Zlo closed the various doors and cabinets he opened, making his way to an empty room filled with furniture. It was the best spot for a forward base, and Dr. Zlo went to work storing the furniture in his inventory, replacing it with various contraptions. Said contraptions were mostly crafted workbenches and chairs, but since Dr. Zlo built them, he refused to think of them as ordinary furniture.

One redecorating later, and Dr. Zlo had the makings of a conference room. He just needed one more piece, Dr. Zlo's personal touch. The villain pulled a portable throne out of his inventory, placing it where he thought the most people would look. There, now the villain had the forward base he needed for Tractus.

Dr. Zlo made his way back out of the building to see if his minions had arrived. Sure enough, the first of his group was cresting over the horizon, Cass's silver head reflecting the light like a rising sun. The villain waited patiently for the group to arrive, letting them settle for a second before stepping forward.

"Well, don't just stand there. Do you want to be seen?" Dr. Zlo chided.

"Sorry, boss," Cass answered. "Had to catch my breath."

"Less talking, more moving," the villain urged. "I'm not about to get caught by a stray patrol."

With those words, Dr. Zlo led everyone into the abandoned building, making sure everyone entered before going in. Cass waited with him, ever the loyal butler.

Once the last Jacques walked in, Dr. Zlo made his way into the constructed conference room. There was a reason Dylan wanted to be the last one inside; he wanted Quartet to see the throne. If the minion held delusions of grandeur, he wouldn't be able to stop himself from sitting on the grand chair. Sadly, that wasn't the case. Quartet stood next to Mabel like one of the Queen's Guard in England.

Dylan realized then why Quartet didn't go for the throne. "Mabel, I know Quartet probably deserves it, but I need him to act independently for the moment," Dr. Zlo told the minion.

"Was just making sure we got up here without trouble, hon," Mabel answered. She released her control of Quartet after, the minion instantly making a beeline away from Mabel.

"Boss, you can't let her control me like that!" Quartet said. "She breaks the entire chain of command!"

"I don't recall setting a chain of command," Dr. Zlo said with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, well. I was interpreting your unspoken orders," Quartet answered.

Dr. Zlo furrowed his brow, "I see. Perhaps then, you can interpret my next set of unspoken orders?"

Quartet looked up at Dr. Zlo, "Take a seat?"

"How astute of you," Dr. Zlo answered.

Quartet hastily sat down in the chair closest to Dr. Zlo's throne, shoving a Jacques out of the way. The minion fell to the ground in an exaggerated fashion, landing on his rear and bouncing twice. Quartet didn't so much as glance in the minion's direction, earning a glare from the pushed Jacques.

Dr. Zlo cleared his throat to get everyone's attention, "Now that we've infiltrated the city, it's time to locate the fusion reactor and create our plan."

Turing scurried out of Dr. Zlo's pocket again, placing the phone in front of the villain so he could see.

We gather that the reactor is located in the center of the city, Turing typed out. Though, we are unsure if the reactor powers the elevator or something else.

"Question," Quartet said. "Are we going to be able to move this thing then? Something that powers a city seems a bit too big for a yacht to carry."

"An excellent question, Quartet," Dr. Zlo responded.

The device itself is relatively small, only as large as a small car, Turing answered.

Mabel frowned, "That don't seem all that small. No offense."

"I'm sure it is, compared to other types like it," Dr. Zlo answered. "Now, where exactly in the center of the city would we find the reactor?"

Under the elevator's main lobby, Turing answered.

The team of minions shared a look. "That sounds like a lot of security," Quartet said.

"That it does," Dr. Zlo answered. "I believe it means we have a few options. The first would be to storm the building, which isn't something I would like to do, considering there are heroes probably crawling all over the building. The second is to cause a distraction somewhere else in the city and then hit the elevator. This is better than the first option, but I'm still hesitant as it depends on how many people we attract with the distraction. The third is infiltration, most likely our best bet."

"I'm all for infiltration, hon," Mabel said. "We could be a couple on our honeymoon touring the sights."

The minion looked at Dr. Zlo and batted her eyelashes at him playfully.

"Eww," Quartet said, making a face.

Mabel shot him a look, shutting the minion up.

"As good as that sounds," Dr. Zlo answered. "We'll need the backup the others can provide."

"Boss, what if we captured someone important and pretended to be their security detail?" Cass inquired.

Dr. Zlo thought about it, bringing his cane hand up to his chin in concentration. Acting as the security detail would work, and Mabel could easily capture one of the officials in charge to use for a "surprise inspection."

"A great idea, Cass!" Dr. Zlo said eventually. "Now we just need to find someone to bodyguard."

Dr. Zlo looked down at his mouse, "Turing! Instruct our recon team to find someone of importance for us to use."

Yes, my lord, Turing typed.

The mouse went to work instructing the others while Dr. Zlo turned back to his team.

"As for the rest of us, what say we drum up some new ideas to use against any possible heroes?"

Quartet and Mabel looked at Dr. Zlo eagerly, but not even they could beat out the Jacques' enthusiasm. The mob of minions crowded toward Dr. Zlo, waving hands like elementary schoolkids who just had to be the first to speak. The Jacques were so excitable, they shoved the table a few inches forward, causing Dr. Zlo to retreat for a moment before raising his cane.

"You," he pointed to the first Jacques. "What idea do you have in mind?"