Chapter 153 - Lus Connection to ----
Chapter 153 - Lu's Connection to ----
Xiong Zhi slowly put down her hand.
She knows the feeling of wanting to get strong. Of wanting to take over your own fears. Of wanting to face them without shaking. If she, who was a 20+ woman in inside shook fear when faced with that beast, what's more of a young boy who experienced fear throughout his whole life?
It would be really hard to overcome this trauma and scars that were left on him. Now Xiong Zhi could not blame Lu Yin Ze anymore for taking his life in the past.
"Then grow strong. I'll keep you company." Xiong Zhi took a step back but she was held by Lu Yin Ze. His hand captured hers. His hand was cold too. Xiong Zhi was surprised by the sudden touch that she flinched and shook it off.
Lu Yin Ze did not let go. His attention was not in her hands. It was on the family picture in front of him.
Xiong Zhi stops struggling and looked at the tall frame of Lu Yin Ze. Then she looked at their hands. Lu Yin Ze was gripping her hand tightly. But since his hand was soft, it was not hurting her. However, Xiong Zhi was uncomfortable. She felt like she had to keep her distance because it doesn't feel right.
But Lu Yin Ze unconsciously gripped her hand tighter. Lu Yin Ze was now in a daze. He seemed to enter a different world. Maybe he falls into half an unconscious state. Living in the memories in his mind while his body was standing.
But he could still speak and knew what's was real and what was an illusion.
"Would you stay for me for a bit? I can't face them alone by myself. Please. Help me this once, Xiong Zhi." Lu Yin Ze's pleading voice echoed to her ears. Lu Yin Ze was still facing the picture. Through their hands, Xiong Zhi could feel the slight tremble of his body. He was cold. But she knew he was trying to be calm. To take control of his emotion and mind.
"I'll stay. Take your time." Xiong Zhi finally said. She was only letting her borrow her hand and presence. That's all. If ever, she would need to avoid being this intimate to him in the future.
It was a long silence. Xiong Zhi felt that Lu Yin Ze finally calmed down. He was not shivering anymore. His eyes were becoming clearer as he stared at the picture.
He finally let go of her hands.
"I'll try to visit this place every night. So I could get used to it." Lu Yin Ze speaks out loud. However, he was more telling it to his self.
Xiong Zhi did not speak and just stayed there.
"Do you know why I want to tell the world the things they have done? " Xiong Zhi did not answer.
"You might be thinking because I want justice and revenge. That's true. But there's a reason I don't want to admit. "
Lu Yin Ze was kept starting at the picture.
In most of his life, the only feelings he had were hate and resentment. It grew and grown to the point of suffocating him. All he wanted to do was to get back to his father whom he hates so much and to his older brother, whom he was so disgusted about.
Those feelings and thoughts were the only things that kept him alive and continue living.
Revenge. And Justice.
Fear. Hate. Resentment.
Those were strong feelings that clouded a person's mind. Lu Yin Ze who was a child back then was no different from those people who went crazy without someone's support. Until a person became helpless as time passed by and resolved everything to death. It might be the only way for them to have a final rest.
But after he was freed to that prison, after he got away from the people whom he resented so much. After he went to school and made friends. Then spent peaceful and contented days. And finally seeing this picture after a long time, Lu Yin Ze's mind became clearer.
He sorted out his thoughts, his feelings, and his dreams.
Lu Yin Ze's eyes were never leaving the picture above.
Those happy days when he was young came back. The wish of his dear mother, and his wish.
And the people he once loved.
Thinking of those, made Lu Yin Ze's sight blurry.
"I want to get my big brother back. I want that man to call him again father." Those words were hard to speak. Lu Yin Ze could even taste those bitter words. Those words that were lingering in his mouth tasted salt like his tears.
He finally said it. He finally admitted it. He finally saw the things that were really inside his heart.
That even he hated them, afraid of them,?he loved them.
"So I decided to stop them. To stop whatever they brewing. To stop them from sinking more in the dark path. I am their family member, I once loved them and even I want to deny it, I still want my family back. But I know it's impossible ever since 'that' day. The only thing I could do right now as their former family member was to stop them. Even it cost my life."
Lu Yin Ze shed tears. No one knows if it were tears of joy for finally learning his true feelings or bitter tears.
"I have never thought it out. Because I'm mad. I feel betrayed. And I'm scared."
Lu Yin Ze had become their prisoner since he was six.
He grew up with love and hate. Until resentment and hate grow more than familial love.
But now since he realized his true heart, his foundation of becoming stronger was more solid. He would never be blind because of revenge. Even he meets them again, he would stand straight and stay calm. He could trick his mind that these people were not that scary as he once thought, they were the people that he needed to save.
This thought would actually make Lu Yin Ze stand in front of his father and brother.
Lu Yin Ze fell silent once more. He was convincing himself to these thoughts. Repeating it to himself over and over again.
After a while, he wipes his tears and turned to Xiong Zhi.
"Sorry, you have to see that. My psychiatrist told me this kind of trick. I guess it's working. "
Xiong Zhi stared at him. She found out that Lu Yin Ze was actually braver than before. It's a good change.
"It's alright. I'm glad you are overcoming this."
Lu Yin Ze was embarrassed. He wanted to talk about something as well. But he was not sure. He thought that he might go overboard. But he still chose to speak of it.
"And there's more."
Xiong Zhi just waited for him to speak.
"Can I also be a part of your company? Like, I will buy a share or if you don't want to sell me anything I can be your business partner." Lu Yin Ze explained hurriedly.
He envied Gu Zhen and Song Xuantin who managed to have shares in Xiong Zhi's company. Besides, he wanted to learn so many things from IHZHI. He thought it was a perfect place and he want it to be his goal to have the same harmony in the Lu Empire. He might be inexperienced in business and he never gone to any workplace. But anyone with a good observation skill would see that IHZHI was a good place to work. All employees were passionate and devoted to their work. They all act as one.
However, it looked like Xiong Zhi was against it. She furrowed her brow.
Seeing her like this, Lu Yin Ze added,
"But if you don't want, it is fine as well. I just really want to learn from your company."
This talk made the serious and sorrow atmosphere gone. Replaced by another serious and tense atmosphere.
"It's not that. But I can't sell you any shares from IHZHI. You are still a Lu. And we could not strike a deal with the Lu Empire now that we are still a small company. This will attract unnecessary attention to IHZHI." Xiong Zhi said truthfully.
"If you want to learn the basics, you need to ask for help from your grandfather. Your grandfather sure has plans better than mine. Just trust him."
Lu Yin Ze was really embarrassed.
"Yes. I'm sorry for putting you in an uncomfortable position."
"It's okay. Actually, I have something to-" tell as well. These words were halted as Xiong Zhi's eyes were captured to one of the pictures, after two pictures of the family picture.
It was a painting of a woman. She looked like she was in her early twenties. She had silver hair and silver-blue eyes. Her distinct features were very similar to Lu Yin Ze.
It was a bit different from the woman in the family picture. But one could tell that Lu Yin Ze, the woman in the family picture and this woman have the same blood. That beautiful and unique silver hair.
But that's not about it that made Xiong Zhi stopped from speaking and run towards the painting.
She heard a voice, a very familiar voice that she knew she heard somewhere.
["A pity. It was truly a pity."]