The Red Hand

Chapter 76 –  The Deep Bond, and An Impossibility.

"No, Kana. No, I don't want to be human anymore. I want to be whole." Akagi declared with her face filled with tears. It was an unexpected statemen and caught Kana off guard.

"What does that mean?" Kana took out a rag from her pocket and wiped Akagi's tears. "Why do you want to give up your humanity? Isn't it good that you still care about us? About me?"

"Kana," Akagi placed her hand on her sister's head. "Ever since I can remember. There's always been a hole inside me. I've always felt like I was missing something, something important." Akagi was still crying. "It's like there was a void in my heart. A void that nothing, not you, not Yumi could fill." 

"A void?" Kana asked. 

"I always thought it was just part of who I was. That I was destined to always have this empty feeling inside of me." Akagi looked her sister in the eyes. "But when I saw you collapsed in the mall. For the briefest of moments, the seal around my soul flickered, bent, and broke. In that instant, part of my real self was released. And for the first time in my life, that void, Kana, that void filled. Just a little bit." Akagi continued to cry. "And you have no idea just how good that felt. After all these years, I found out just what I was missing, where it was, and how to get it. For the first time, I could be whole, I could truly be me, and I could be rid of this empty feeling inside." Akagi cupped Kana's cheek. "But.... even though I know how.... even though I know where... I-I-I can't do it. I can't do it, Kana."

Kana had never seen her sister cry like this, and she'd never heard any mention of this feeling of emptiness inside her sister's heart. She'd always known Akagi struggled with her issues, but this was much more than she'd ever expected. Though, she figured this might explain some of her problems. Akagi was always cold, distant and irritable. She often had a hard time dealing with people. But ever since the mall, she'd seemed happier.

"If I give in... If I give in and let myself free. Then while I would fill that void, that would most likely mean I lose you and everyone else I care about." Akagi continued. "That power, Kana, it's intoxicating, it's like a drug. And it wants me to destroy, to burn, to kill. If I let myself free, then I'd most likely be overwhelmed by it, and there would be nothing left but the monster you saw in your vision. A version of me who cares for nothing else but death and destruction." Akagi whipped the tears from her eyes. "And that's not acceptable. I refuse to allow myself to be controlled, even by my own power."

"Can't you find a way to control it?" Kana asked. "Is there no way you can figure out how to let yourself out and keep your sense of self?" She wanted her sister to find a way to be happier without turning into a monster.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out." Akagi chuckled. "But I fear that I don't have much time left." Akagi turned to look at her soul. "Each day, the barrier weakens, and while my will is strong." She shook her head. "Even I cannot resist such temptation forever." She gave a dry laugh.  "The call to violence and destruction... its too... tempting." Her voice briefly distorted.

"So, that means I'm just going to lose you! That you're destined to become a monster that destroys the world?!?" Kana exclaimed. "That's not fair! You don't deserve that!"

"Destroying the world was probably what I was intended to do from the start, Kana," Akagi said. "Mizumi said the barrier was never intended to last. It's a miracle that I've held myself back this long. I fear that if something like what happened to you happens again, that might just be it." Akagi sighed. "I wanted to explain all this to you now while I have the chance. You needed to know the truth, and well, here it is. Your so-called sister is actually some kind of world-destroying Demon who's struggling to hold herself back from doing just that."

Kana stood silently.

"You said you'd stay by my side no matter what. But that was before you knew everything. So, I'll ask now. Do you still consider me your sister? After everything I've shown you? After admitting that the real me is a monster that wants to kill everyone and even eat your very soul. Can you really think of a being like that as your sister?" Akagi turned around and gave a passionate statement. She wasn't sure what Kana's response would be, but she'd steeled herself to be rejected. "Am I not just a monster in your eyes?"

Kana slowly walked up to Akagi and stood about a foot in front of her. Akagi readied herself to be slapped, but to her surprise, Kana brought her into a hug. "You really are an idiot. Aren't you?" Kana squeezed her tight. "I told you already. None of that stuff matters. You're my sister, demon, human, or something else. I don't care." Kana looked up into Akagi's eyes. "I won't act like I understand everything you've been through, but I would never abandon you. Not now, not ever."

{I swore that I'd make up for my mistakes and I'll do everything in my power to save you.} Kana squeezed her tight.

"How can you just be ok with this?" Akagi asked. "I just said that I want to eat, not just your soul, but everyone's! I want to destroy the world! That's the real me! How could you call someone like that anything but a monster?!?" She couldn't believe Kana could truly care for such a creature.

"Because you're my sister." Kana squeezed her tighter. "Even if you want to destroy the world. Even if you wish to eat everyone including me, you're first and foremost my sister. I don't care about the rest, I accept you for everything you are, good and bad." 

{I owe you that much...} Kana let go of Akagi and turned to face her sisters soul before yelling.

"ONEE-CHAN!!!!" Kana yelled. "YOU DON'T NEED TO BE CONTROLLED BY THAT POWER, AND YOU DON'T NEED TO BE AFRAID OF IT! ITS YOUR'S! YOU DON'T NEED TO LISTEN TO IT. DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO! NOT WHAT IT TELLS YOU TO! YOU DON'T NEED TO HIDE! NOT FROM ME AND NOT FROM ANYONE ELSE!" Kana let out a breath. "I'll be waiting for you. And when you finally come out. I'll give you a big hug."

Inside Akagi's soul, the two orange eyes appeared once again and looked back at Kana, and a loud groan could be heard before the eyes disappeared into the darkness and faded away.

"K-Kana, do you have any idea what you're saying?!?" Akagi stumbled back. "If you say those things- gah!" Akagi' clutched her chest in pain as the cracks on her soul grew.

"I believe in you Onee-chan." Kana turn to face Akagi with a smile on her face. "It might not be today, but I believe that you can conquer this. No matter what reason you were given all this power, it's still yours." Kana continued. "You have every right to take control of your own destiny. If after everything, you still want to destroy the world, if you still want to eat my soul, then that's fine. But I want that to be your decision. Not because you were compelled to, but because you wanted to." Kana's happy smile completely contrasted with the insane words she just spoke.

The pain in Akagi's chest stopped and she stood up, her face covered in sweat. "Kana, you know you're just as insane as me? Who else would tell their sister they'd gladly let them eat their soul?" Akagi shook her head in exasperation.

"There's a fine line between genius and insanity." Kana smiled. "If loving you makes me insane, then so be it."

"I think that goes beyond just normal love, Kana." Akagi sighed.

"If eating my soul would genuinely bring you happiness, then so be it." Kana's face was serious. "I don't exactly want that to happen, but I would if I must."

{I owe you a debt I can never hope to pay, even if you don't see it that way.} Kana kept this thought to herself.

"You really are my sister, aren't you?" Akagi chuckled. "Who else but crazies like us could stand inside a place like this, discuss destroying the world, and then talk about me eating your soul."

"If there was any doubt in your mind, I hope that cleared it up." Kana chuckled as Akagi hugged her again.

"Thank you, Kana. Thank you for accepting me and for always being there for me. If it wasn't for you. I would have already..." Akagi understood just why she'd stayed sane all these years. It wasn't just some iron will or desire to stay in control.

{It's because I didn't want to hurt Kana. That's why I've held on, isn't it?} Akagi separated from Kana and looked her in the eye. {No, it's not just Kana.} Akagi's mind instantly went to Yumi. {For some reason, the thought of Yumi crying because I lost myself... It pains me... It pains me even more than if it were Kana.} Akagi laughed. {I never expected someone to mean more to me than Kana. I didn't even think that was possible. But I guess I've been lying to myself all this time. Yumi really is the most important person in this world to me, isn't she? I might not be capable of loving Yumi, but I can't deny that I feel something more than just a friendship. Perhaps she really does mean as much to me as I do to her? Perhaps we really do both need each other, even more than I ever imagined?} Akagi resolved to answer the question of what Yumi meant to her. As she thought this, a word that she'd never heard before appeared in her mind, it flowed out from her soul and directly into her mind, just as other information had.

"[A Bonded Soul.]" Akagi said the word that came to her mind and was assaulted by an influx of information on the term.

"Onee-chan. What does that mean? A Bonded Soul?" Kana asked, which took Akagi off guard.

"Kana!" Akagi gripped her sister's shoulders. "How do you know that word!" Akagi herself had just learned it, so Kana couldn't possibly have heard it before.

"???" Kana tilted her head. "You just said it didn't you? [A Bonded Soul.]" Kana repeated the word which caused both sisters to freeze.

"Kana, how can you speak Demon?" Akagi stared at her sister in complete shock, and Kana had no answer for her. The two stood in complete shock as they now had another question to answer.