Chapter 90 - I Belong To You - Part【3】
"It is not of course. But it is wrong to tear apart their wings so they cannot fly and that is exactly what your parents and your brother did to you. Have you ever thought back to the day when that male violated you near the bar in your own pack and there was no wolf to save you? Have you ever pondered over what would have transpired if I was not there? The mere thought of it haunts my dreams." He spits upon the ground as though the words he says leave a foul aftertaste.
"What happened that night, it was not my family's fault. It was my own for I had foolishly gotten drunk and-"
"Stop defending them, Theia." The slight raise of his voice, his irritation has me flinch with a hushed whimper and take another step back farther away from his heat.
"W-Why are you speaking about my family this way? Is it because I am inexperienced and ask you a lot of questions about sex? Would you rather I strayed from the moral path and spread my legs for numerous males to get that experience for you?"
He swiftly turns to meet my eyes his own flaring to the words I spewed whilst a turbulent thundering roar erupts from his chest his lips pulled back to reveal his sharp canines. "You know that is not what I mean."
"And what about you? Do you think you are so perfect? Perhaps you are as an Alpha but you aren't as my male! Maybe you are right...maybe I would be different if my family guarded me less. But how could they when I was literally fading away all because my male chose to reject me after calling me undeserving?" I screech with uncontrollable tears freely gushing down my cheeks. Cruel male, he continually hurts me with heartless words.
"I-"
"No. You do not get to stomp upon my family or me when you have done worse things to your female. Y-You brazenly called Lumina worthy right in front of me, you wouldn't even utter a single word to me but pranced around happily with Moira when you first brought me here and you ripped me away from the only wolves I have ever known when you thought it was the right time you selfish male!" I sob dejectedly wiping my tears with the rear of my quivering palms soft whines departing my aching chest.
"You misunderstand me I-" He halts defending himself when he sees the obvious effects of his words on me. "Forgive me, I did not mean to make you cry Drah ."
Weeping audibly rushing into the tent I yank its flaps sealing it up as a sign for him to stay out and leave me be. He pays attention to my wishes as always not overstepping my boundaries and I hear a dull sigh leaving his lips whilst his footsteps wander away from our shelter by the river.
It is not like I do not understand where he is coming from, I do feel embarrassed to ask him certain questions to which the answers I must know at this age. But it is what it is, I already miss my family too much that no matter the number of phone calls I make home they cannot overcome the distance between us. I yearn for mama's warmth and papa's homemade chicken pie that he makes best. And most of the time I crave Cronus's brotherly love and support.
Phobos does not know any of this for I have never conversed with him of my sadness or grief on this matter. I want to show him how happy I am here with him. Instead, this is what he gives me in return.
After a few minutes of me mutely criticising my thick-skulled male, the sound of the tent flaps being hushedly pushed away has me turn towards the entrance. A small bouquet of wild freesia flowers is held through the minute crack by a muscular tattooed limb his ocean blues sneakily peeping in to examine the state of my mood.
"I apologize. I shouldn't have said my truth so candidly for I am aware how much you miss your family." That is all he says waiting to hear something from me in answer to his apology. I disregard his presence keeping my mouth sealed muffled hiccups quaking my flesh as I silently draw the covers over my body concealing myself from him. Silent treatment is what males detest to receive from their females yet it performs well as a means to reprimand for he will never repeat it.
He noiselessly saunters forward towards where I am sprawled to sink down beside me. "Theia." He beckons me lovingly striving to raise the blanket so he can see my eyes for he wishes to read my emotions.
"No!" I bark furiously holding onto it tighter not abiding by his wishes and he promptly lets go of the blanket not wanting to force me. He cannot just hurt me with unkind words and hand me a couple of flowers thinking I would be swayed I am not that easy or- the freesias smell quite nice I must admit.
"You know what I said is true. I meant no harm I only spoke my truth." I do not respond to him upsetly wriggling away from his fond touches for I am sulking and he sees this clear as day.
"You will not speak to me? Then I shall take it as an opportunity to defend myself of my past actions which you seem to have surely misunderstood." He clears his throat as though he feels a bit awkward revealing his truth.
"When you were eighteen I used to watch you often you were... the most beautiful female I had ever laid eyes upon and the way you ripened ardently tantalized and mesmerized me in every way that an uncontrollable urge developed to whisk you away yet you were so very naive in many ways, I knew if I brought you here it would have pleased me tremendously but it would have come at a price, your happiness. My pack would have been harsh to you and I wouldn't have been able to protect you at that time. I was still undergoing training and did not have as much power as I do today. When I said underserving I meant that you did not deserve what my pack would have done to you. I did not explain myself that time and rashly ran away without considering how my words and actions might have wrecked you...I was a coward indeed. Forgive me."
I hear him shuffling around into a more comfortable position and once he finds it the weight of his body plops down beside me, the heat of his flesh soothing me but more than anything his words bring me the peace I desperately needed and it feels as though an enormous burden has been lifted off my heart and mind.
"A-And Lumina?" I whisper softly from under the covers.
"She is worthy, Theia. She was truly deserving of being the rightful Luna of Deimos's pack. Was she not? I do not understand why me calling her so had agitated you." I had unwisely thought he found her worthy as a female rather than me to sit on his right instead. I have...misjudged him.
"Why wouldn't you speak to me when you first brought me here?" I unobtrusively peel back the fur blanket creating a minute opening from underneath to take a glance at him. Phobos has his palms held beneath his head and he is relaxed his eyes closed whilst he calmly listens to me. There is this raw rugged beauty to him his features are so different from what I am used to back home and this male of mine need not do anything but just a few sweet words accompanied by that alluring face is more than enough to bring me to my knees.
There is a deep silence that envelopes us and he takes his time to answer as though he does not like the words he shall utter.
"Because you were terrified of me." His truth has my eyes widen.
"I wasn't I-"
"No need to deny it Drah. I could see it visibly every time I gazed into your eyes, you took a step backwards each time I took one towards you. So I kept my distance I thought staying away from you would not push you away further from my reach. You did not want me as much as I wanted you. I knew I had changed in several ways from when I was a juvenile and I knew you must have gotten numerous warnings from your brother of me or heard stories of my slaughter. You weren't simply frightened of me you did not like me at all, did you? What I had become?"
My male is so very...foolish. His insecurities I wish to embrace them and love them away. I was blinded by my unease of the sudden situation he thrust me into but I did not bother to know anything about his feelings at all as he cared for mine.
I cast the blanket away exposing my stripped flesh to him but he does not unseal his eyes remaining still his chest rising and falling to every deep breath he takes in.