Spirit Hotel

The woes of being Feisha

Having shared a meal together, the two became fast friends. Layton had especially invited Feisha to see his latest invention, the Domino Listening Device.

Feisha picked up the device and inspected it in his hands. Are you sure this is a bug and not a kaleidoscope? The first phone on Noahs Ark seems like distant dream after all

Stuff like kaleidoscopes have nothing on my listening device.

Cant you make it more like a telephone? Feisha gestured with his hands. Its curvy on the sides, and

Layton rolled his eyes. I know what telephones look like. But how could something that needs cables or signal connection ever compare to my Domino Listening Device?

This piqued Feishas interest. He turned the tube that looked to be a few centimetres thicker than a kaleidoscope in his hands. How do I use this thing?

Point it at the source of the sound and turn the distance gear on the bottom until you can hear clearly.

Feisha followed his instructions, but there was still only silence. I cant hear anything, he whined.

Do you think theres any sound in the direction youre pointing?

At this time, the front counter was undoubtedly dead quiet. Feisha thought about this for a while, then pointed the device at Gins room, slowly turning the gear in his hand. He could make out the sound of gentle moaning.

Followed by Gins low groan of pleasure.

Fucking pervert.

Face flaming red, Feisha quickly lowered the listening device. Clearly having experienced this before, Layton merely patted Feisha sympathetically on the shoulder, saying, You can return it tomorrow.

The eternally stingy Layton was capable of lending things? Feisha quickly thanked him before he could change his mind, then left with the intention of finding somewhere better to listen from. This place had no TVs, no computers and no thought-provoking videos; he could at least be allowed to indulge in this, right? Humming a whimsical tune, Feisha lightly skipped to his room with the device on his ear, making sure to sweep all 360 degrees.

Suddenly, a sound brushed past him. He paused in his steps, then backtracked.

There was a series of furious smashing noises. Feisha felt his heart skip a beat; there wouldnt be a monster like Godzilla or something locked up here somewhere, right? After a period of consideration, the source of the sound was confirmed to be the food storage.

Half curious and half worried for his food, Feisha decided to investigate. As he approached, the smashing noises slowed to a stop, turning into defiant knocks.

An annoyed grumble: Whyre the metal walls here still so thick?

The voice belonged to none other than Antonio. Feisha didnt have time to be shocked at this for long, however, because the next voice belonged to Dea, Stop making so much noise.

I havent fallen in here for at least thirty years. I didnt think that the traps here were still functional, goddamnit, Antonio huffed.

Its always been me who chose fruits to take to the kitchen, why didyoucome?

I came here for hazelnuts, replied Antonio. Except Id rather have a hammer right now so I can smash this place into a pulp.

The device soon fell silent, and Feisha entered the warehouse. It hasnt changed much since his last visit, barring the absence of a certain redheaded faerie.

The crack in the ground was still there, Feisha discovered as he walked around the shelves. There were baskets of pineapple and watermelon, and also some pomegranates scattered on the ground.

Feisha swept the ground with the device again. Unfortunately, Antonio and Dea didnt speak anymore; even their breathing were too light to be detected. Circling around for the third time, Feisha decided to just take a pomegranate and leave. Antonio and Dea both seemed familiar with the place, judging by their tone earlier. Just as he was about to pick up the pomegranate, however, a light tremor passed through the ground.

Before he could react, the ground opened up beneath his feet and sent him into freefall.

Ah-

He hadnt even been screaming for a second before landing on something soft.

A voice came from behind his head. Damn it, why the hell areyouin here?

Feisha looked around at the room bathed in orange glow, then at the sinister shadows cast onto Antonios face.

I- I fell, he stuttered.

Antonio let him down, glaring at the pomegranate. Why did you pick the pomegranate as well?

What pomegranate?

Antonio kicked the round object underfoot- a bright red pomegranate. Feisha turned to face Dea, who was also holding a pomegranate in his arms.

Er, is this some kind of code? The thing he had heard before was clearly hazelnuts

Has nobody ever told you that this warehouse is full of traps? Goddamnit, I should never have prepared that goddamn blueberry hazelnut cake.

Feisha looked at Dea, whose expression seemed to be saying: thats right, I didnt tell you; what are you going to do about it?

Is there a way of getting out? Feisha said, licking his chapped lips.

Waiting. Well be able to get out after twenty-four hours.

Feisha jumped up with a start. Twenty-four hours!?

Hmph. Serves you right for stealing pomegranates.

Then what about eating, drinking, pissing and shitting?

Take care of the first two by yourself, and the second two are forbidden from being taken care of!

Cant we call for help?

We could before, Antonio muttered softly.

A flicker of hope lit up in Feishas heart. What about now?

We cant.

Why?

Because Isefel only appeared thirty times, Dea piped up.

Seeing that Feisha was still confused, Antonio helpfully explained, And this is my hundred and first time being locked in here.

Three hundred and first, added Dea.

Feisha looked on the verge of tears. So youre saying that my first time was destroyed by you guys?

The silence was gruelling. Especially because sitting in front of him was a werewolf who may or may not suddenly burst into rabies and eat him, and a faerie who keeps sending him disgusted looks. In the short span of only half an hour, Feisha had already changed his sitting position sixteen times.

Do you have hemorrhoids or something? asked Antonio, agitated by his constant shuffling.

Feisha squirmed from his spot on the ground. Nah, Im just really bored.

Im going to knock you out the next time you move.

The shuffling noises ceased. Oh yeah, you havent told me why this place has so many traps yet. He might as well do something to pass time.

Because this warehouse is alive.

Feisha wiped at his profusely sweating forehead with a shaky hand. Hahahaha, its alright, I grew up readingOne Thousand and One NightsandStrange Stories from a Chinese Studio. This kind of small shocks doesnt affect me, nope. Please continue.

Im finished.

Wasnt that just the synopsis?

Can I select the main text now?

Do I look like a book kind of person?

Feisha hurriedly shook his head.

Of course not. He paused for a bit, before continuing. Youre not a person at all.

Antonio glared at him then sat down, leaned on the wall and attempted to nap.

Feisha looked at Dea. Man, he was seriously out of everyones league. Deas beauty really shone through even in the dull lighting.

Maybe they were sitting too close together, but Feishas grudge from their last meeting was quickly forgotten as he felt his heartbeat sped up.

Dea frowned lightly. The warehouse is a living thing. It chooses a different fruit or vegetable every day, and traps anyone who happens to pick it up.

Uh. Is there a reason for that?

Boredom.

Feisha was speechless. Doesnt that mean youd fall in here a few times each month? No wonder he was so calm about it.

My luck only fails me a few times each year.

That makes sense, actually. Theres an awful lot of food in the warehouse, which makes the probability of choosing a particular one miniscule in comparison.

So this is basically like a lottery?

What is a lottery?

Feisha sighed. Its when a million people throw money into the ocean in hopes of picking more back up at the next high tide.

Time passed by in tormentingly slow seconds. Feisha could feel pressure building in his bladder and hummed a tune to distract himself.

Antonio was not appreciative of his humming. Either sing properly or shut the fuck up!

At this, Feisha cranked his volume dial up to max: The girl from Ali mountain-

Bang. The pomegranate bounced off his head. Feisha slowly slid down to the ground.

And all was right with the world.

Severe vertigo was the first sensation that greeted Feisha upon waking up.

And Fuck! was the first word he said upon waking up. He peeled back his eyelids and abruptly sat up, only to collapse back down as the room started to spin.

You can take three days off.

Feisha looked towards the source of the sound. Isefel was sitting in a chair, leisurely reading a book.

The most pressing concern: Do I get penalised for it?

No, it counts as paid leave.

A relieved sigh; this could be considered welfare.

But the day you spent inside the trap is counted as absence without leave.

Fuck! Feisha punched the bed. Cant you put it down as work injury?

It was after work.

Does this hotel not take responsibility of their employees well-being?

Which is why you have three days leave.

Was that a threat? That if he were to refuse, there wouldnt even be three days leave? Under the oppressing authority, Feisha shed tears inwardly.

Isefel closed his book. I put toothpaste onto your wound; it should reduce the swelling.

Toothpaste?

Feishas lips twitched in amusement. Do you use toothpaste to reduce swelling down in Hell as well?

Could this life hack have originated from Hell!?

No, I learned of this from a book on human life and behaviour.

Couldnt you have read a more professional book?

I could. But we dont have anything detailed in the book here on Noahs Ark.

A pause.

How do you fallen angels usually take care of bumps like this? asked Feisha. He patted the raised area on his head and gasped at the pain.

We dont get hit.

Why did this exchange give him the feeling of dj vu?

One thing worth celebrating during his recovery period, however, was that he had made some good friends. The visits from Hughes and Asa were expected, but Layton certainly was not. Reason being, Feisha couldnt remember Layton coming out of his lab for anything other than maintenance and meals since he had first come to Noahs Ark.

Dont worry too much, Im fine, Feisha said, tearing up slightly.

I know youre fine, but Im still worried.

This friendship was almost like his friendship with Hughes. Feisha felt kind of unaccustomed to how fast they were progressing, but Laytons next words made him feel very accustomed:

Im worried about the Domino Listening Device.

I was unconscious on the way back, said Feisha, awkwardly.

Sitting down on the chair previously occupied by Isefel, Layton crossed his legs and looked at him with an unsurprised expression. Feisha felt a flame of passion overtaking his body.

Worry not, my friend, for I will surely retrieve it.

Youd better, Layton scoffed, jumping off the chair. I originally wanted you to help me test out its features, but youhmph. Be prepared to pay up a hundred and fifty gold coins if you dont get it back.

Hearing the click of a door closing, Feisha sat there for a long time.

So in the past day he had racked up another debt. One hundred and fifty dollars for absence without leave, and another hundred and fifty gold coins for losing the goddamn listening device.

He slowly lowered himself onto the bed, ducking under the covers.

After a while, sobbing noises came from under the blanket: Why, oh why did I pass out? And why did I have to wake up!?