Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu

Volume 4, Chapter 104 [Theta Pt.2]

[Theta: And that’s all the pieces of the past I saw in the Tomb]

Ending her story there, Theta brought the already cold tea to her lips and took a sip.

Sitting on the bed meekly listening to her tale, Subaru held his breath as Theta announced that it was over. Then, with a long, deep sigh, he expelled everything that had pent up inside him.

He strained his lungs to their limit, spewing out all of the air and indescribable emotions in his chest―― and raised his head.

[Subaru: So that’s… the actual foundation of the Sanctuary, and Lewes Meyer’s memories]

[Theta: I’m sure you already know what happened to Lewes after she was swallowed by the crystal. She’s still preserved exactly as she was back then, deep in the Great Witch’s research facility]

[Subaru: But, this doesn’t match what I know about the crystal’s purpose at all. Echidona never mentioned that the Lewes Meyer in the crystal had anything to do with the Sanctuary’s Barrier, but said that it was for something else……]

According to Echidona in the Citadel of Dreams, Lewes Meyer was sealed in the crystal for Echidona’s experiments in an attempt to attain immortality.

By sealing Lewes in the crystal, cloning her, and then filling the clones with Echidona’s own memories, she would’ve been able to achieve a kind of pseudo-immortality. But Echidona’s death or some kind of technical error meant that the experiment failed to bear fruit, while, over time, the mechanism continued to automatically create more and more Lewes replicants.

Theta’s story had mentioned nothing about this pursuit of immortality.

Instead, what Subaru heard were multiple pieces of information which he simply could not let slide.

[Subaru: Then the real reason Echidona created the Sanctuary…… that guy they were trying to keep out… who is he?]

[Lewes: …………]

[Subaru: In the story, Roswaal called him “Melancholy”, but I’ve never seen or heard anything about this guy before. I didn’t even know he existed until now. That whole time, I thought the person chasing Echidona was the Witch of Envy]

The Witch of Envy, who destroyed the six Witches of Sin:

Subaru had been convinced that the being he’d met in the dream was the one who cornered Echidona. But the character in the story turned out to be someone else entirely, someone Subaru hadn’t heard the even vaguest mention of until now.

It was only natural that he’d be confused.

However, the fact that he was called “Melancholy” did give Subaru some ideas, as much as he wished that they weren’t true.

[Subaru: The Seven Deadly Sins are Pride, Envy, Wrath, Sloth, Greed, Gluttony, and Lust…… But I heard it used to be different, and there were a few sins that got absorbed]

For someone like Subaru, the “Seven Deadly Sins” was a term that struck very close to home. And so, Subaru had naturally dabbled in some of this trivia, and, after mobilizing his memories, he found what he was looking for.

[Subaru: If I remember correctly…… “Melancholy” and “Vainglory” used to be counted among the Deadly Sins]

Before they were excluded from the other seven, Melancholy and Vainglory were once considered Deadly Sins. And if Melancholy existed, then it wouldn’t be strange for Vainglory to exist as well.

If there existed other Sins aside from the widely-known Witches, then,

[Theta: It’d help me a lot if you could figure out on your own why I couldn’t talk about some of these memories freely]

[Subaru: Why you couldn’t……?]

Subaru furrowed his brows as a wily grin unbefitting of Theta’s appearance rose onto her face.

[Theta: It was just like you said, Su-bo. Outside of these memories, I haven’t heard a lick about anyone called “Melancholy”, either. Anyone else you ask would give you the same answer. Though the world may have forgotten the names of the Witches of Sin, their existence is still told in legends. But the fact that no one knows that a being with such immense power even existed…… is simply terrifying]

[Subaru: ――――]

Theta’s downcast gaze spoke volumes of her apprehension.

Indeed, something was strange about all this.

The Witch of Envy had been passed down through the generations as a synonym of horror and hate. Although the memories of the other Witches had been reduced to just the beings who were consumed by the Witch of Envy, their existence still remained in history.

Yet, not even a single shadow of Melancholy’s existence remained. Was it only a coincidence that the topic never came up around Subaru or Theta?

――Was it really possible that Subaru, who had attended the Witches’ tea party and met all those Witches, had not picked up even a whiff of this person’s existence?

[Subaru: ……That first-generation Roswaal… did he die? If he did, then what’s with his descendant, the current Roswaal? Is he from a different branch of the family?]

[Theta: He did not die in battle. That’s what I heard, at least. From just the memories I saw, he must’ve been on the verge of death, but somehow managed to hang onto life. Although, I assume he would not have recovered to live a normal life. ……After what happened, this first-generation Roswaal, who should have gone on to reach the pinnacle of the Arcane Arts, instead delved deeper and deeper into more sinister magic]

Surely, Theta must’ve done everything she could in order to learn the truth. She alone would have had the most reason to want to verify whether those memories about “Melancholy” were genuine.

But, judging from the vagueness of her answer, it would seem that she did not succeed in her efforts.

[Subaru: If the original purpose of the Sanctuary was to keep Melancholy away from Echidona, and Lewes Meyer assented to Echidona’s plan and sacrificed herself to protect the Sanctuary…… then the crystal creating replicants must’ve come later……?]

[Theta: The ability to generate replicants is unnecessary for a system only meant to create a Barrier. Most likely, you’re right. The question is, what would be the motive for installing an additional function of generating replicants afterwards?]

[Subaru: If Echidona was the one behind it…… then the motive would be immortality. But if it was…… then I have no idea what she was thinking when she came up with that idea]

What must Echidona have felt when she saw Lewes Meyer sleeping in the crystal?

Echidona knew about “Melancholy”. Based on Theta’s memories, that much was certain. And yet, if she did, then there was something terribly unnatural about her behavior during her conversations with Subaru.

――Just what could be the answer to this newborn, isolated awryness?

[Subaru: What on earth am I missing here…?]

Gritting his teeth, Subaru vexed over the missing piece keeping him from seeing the picture.

Finally, he scratched his head, deciding to postpone answering this question for now. And, the last part of Lewes’ story that Subaru could not let slide was,

[Subaru: ――Beatrice lost her friend in the end]

[Theta: ……She did]

Lewes Meyer was bashful and timid. Beatrice proud and stubborn.

Chances are, Lewes Meyer and Beatrice never even recognized their friendship until their very, very last moment together.

When Lewes Meyer melted into that crystal, just how much did that final, curse-like show of love wound Beatrice’s heart?

Was it because of this parting that Beatrice rejected everyone for all four hundred years?

[Subaru: She lost someone in a painful way, and she’s too afraid to hope again. ……It’s not like I can’t understand that feeling]

He could still remember Beatrice as she rejected his hand and begged him to let her die.

Was her reluctance to place hope in others all the result of her four hundred years of loneliness, of the memory of her parting with Lewes that first incited this isolation, and of the deep, cutting wound it had left?

Subaru felt like he could finally understand why she had become so reliant on Echidona’s instruction to wait for “That Person”, and just how much the passage of time had whittled down her heart.

The wound in Beatrice’s heart from the loss of her only friend had remained an unhealable scar. If she could finally meet “That Person” and fulfill Echidona’s instruction, then perhaps her heart could be healed. But the absurd passage of time had caused the wound to fester, and grow so swollen that it could burst.

And so, that girl felt like she was nearing her limit.

[Subaru: ……Lewes-san, have any of you ever met Beatrice?]

[Theta: No, never. By the time the first of us were born, Beatrice-sama had already stopped coming to the Sanctuary, and she never visited since. None of the other replicants know about these memories, so I think it’s best that we don’t meet her]

[Subaru: ――――]

Ultimately, Subaru agreed with Theta.

The real Lewes Meyer was sleeping inside the crystal. Although Theta looked exactly the same as the Lewes Meyer back then, she had no genuine memories of her time together with Beatrice.

If Beatrice met Theta and the other replicants now, her wound would only widen and bring her nothing but anguish.

But――

[Subaru: She absolutely needs to meet you guys]

In order for this girl, who witnessed the Sanctuary’s creation and inherited Lewes Meyer’s wish, to start walking again, she absolutely must do this.

[Subaru: So can I take that as all the reasons you went into hiding and tried to conceal the past?]

[Theta: ……Yes. That is all. The Warlock they called “Melancholy” that seemed to exist nowhere outside of Lewes Meyer’s memories… whether he really existed or not, it is overwhelmingly strange]

[Subaru: I agree. With that and Echidona’s attitude, there must be something more to this]

[Theta: And actually…… there is one more thing]

Subaru furrowed his brows as Lewes interrupted, lowering her gaze. She kept her eyes off of Subaru as she continued,

[Theta: If this Sanctuary was created by Lewes Meyer…… by the wish of our progenitor…… how could we break this Barrier that was erected by the sacrifice of her life? I lack the courage to do it]

[Subaru: ――――]

[Theta: The times have changed. We are separated by centuries from Lewes Meyer’s era. The treatment of half-bloods, the persecution and ostracism from the generation where the Witch of Envy’s terror reigned, must’ve improved somewhat by now. ……I understand why people would urge for this place to be liberated so they could set their sights to the outside world…]

[Subaru: ……Of course, I can’t say that everything is perfect. Discrimination is still around everywhere. And I’m sure you’ll face a lot of unpleasantness if you leave. But…]

Subaru’s thoughts turned to the scene in the Royal Palace.

To Emilia, in the Royal Selection Hall, who put her thoughts and ideals into words while she withstood the malevolence directed at her in turn.

Surely, a world where Emilia’s ideals are achieved would be a world where the people of the Sanctuary would be safe, and where Lewes Meyer’s wish would be fulfilled.

[Subaru: When Emilia’s dream is realized, this ended Sanctuary will be born anew. Because once all her dreams come true… everyone in this world would be able to call it their Sanctuary]

[Theta: ――――]

No doubt, Emilia would endeavor to make it happen. And though he couldn’t say for sure, at least half of the other Royal Selection candidates must also strive for such a world.

After all, no person’s value should be determined by their race.

This idea which comes so naturally to Subaru would certainly be accepted far and wide one day.

[Theta: It’s only a dream. But it certainly is pleasant to the ears]

[Subaru: Yeah. So, does that mean I’ve got your heart fluttering?]

[Theta: Flirting with an old hag like myself, what a sinful man you are, Su-bo]

Holding back the chuckles in the back of her throat, Theta’s youthful features instantly took on an elderly hue.

Then, watching Subaru’s tongue-in-cheek shrug, Theta’s expression brightened once more,

[Theta: Seeing how much I want to be duped by those pleasant words, I guess I’m really getting old]

[Subaru: Or maybe it’s just the little girl inside you falling for my dangerous charms]

[Theta: Pff]

[Subaru: That’s the first time I got scoffed off by a Lewes-san, you know!]

Flinging his hands into the air and then down again, Subaru slumped in defeat. Theta only shook her head at Subaru’s strange behavior and set her empty cup on the table.

Then, looking up at the crisscrossed silver shields on the wall,

[Theta: A time when the world outside this Sanctuary―― also becomes a Sanctuary, huh]

[Subaru: That time will come. And when it does, it’ll be a shame if you’re still holed up in here. There’s nothing more fun than flipping the middle finger at all the assholes who told you you won’t make it, after all]

True worth comes from overcoming something that no one else thought you could.

That’s what all challenges and battles are.

Because the most magnificent struggle is one chasing after an impossible dream.

[Theta: ――Alright, Su-bo. I’ll go along with you and Emilia-sama’s dreams]

[Subaru: Theta-san……]

[Theta: I’ve already decided from the start. If you’re the first one to reach me, I’ll tell you the story and leave the decision to you. Now that you’ve heard the story, I see you still want to liberate the Sanctuary…… and you even managed to laugh off my concerns]

[Subaru: I don’t think I can muster enough bravado to actually laugh it off though…]

[Theta: Even so, that’s fine. Mm, that’s fine]

As if letting go of some heavy burden, Theta nodded several times to Subaru’s answer.

From her reaction, Subaru could sense that she had finally reached out her hand from the prison of those memories which, in all those years, she had no one to share with.

Whether or not to take that hand and bring her to the outside world―― was the decision she had left to him.

[Subaru: So now, there’s no longer any Lewes-sans opposed to liberating the Sanctuary, right?]

[Theta: Right. ……But this won’t mean anything until the Sanctuary’s Barrier is released. It is still up to Emilia-sama to pass the Trials, that much hasn’t changed]

Just when Subaru gave himself a relieved pat on the chest for eliminating one outstanding issue, Theta pulled him back to reality. Hearing this, Subaru’s relaxed cheeks tensed once more.

It was certainly a relief that he found Theta. But the fact that many more problems remain unresolved hadn’t changed.

He managed to find Theta before Garfiel could.

But Emilia is still missing, even now.

[Theta: You’re confident in Emilia-sama’s chances of overcoming the Trial, then?]

[Subaru: I’ve tried all sorts of things to encourage her…… or, hoped would encourage her. But the medicine might’ve been too strong and now I’m having a bit of trouble tracking her down. We’re hoping for a quick solution]

[Theta: Y-you don’t know where she is!? Y-you sure this is going to work!? After everything I’ve just told you about my past, you realize if Emilia bungles this, all of my resolve is going to waste!?]

[Subaru: You’re totally right to be worried so I can’t exactly complain, but…… well, after hearing your story, I thought of something]

Lewes Meyer sacrificed her life in order to protect the Sanctuary.

The way she placed others before herself to the very, very end was a lot like that girl who always prioritized others to her own detriment.

Even if her heart was being withered by endless anguish and mounting hardships, Subaru would not believe for a second that that girl would lose sight of her responsibility and of the hopes placed in her.

[Subaru: I think I might know where she is]

[Theta: ――――]

[Subaru: And even if that’s not it, we’ll turn this little Sanctuary upside down to find her. Even now, my buddy must be half in tears looking all over the place. And if that still isn’t enough to find her, then that just leaves the one place we couldn’t look]

Seeing Subaru’s conviction, the slightly-panicked Theta relinquished a long sigh. Without asking for further confirmation, she only continued with [In that case…],

[Theta: If you’re saying you can find Emilia and have her pass the Trial…… then Gar-bo would be the last hurdle]

[Subaru: Just from the fragments I heard from Sigma-san, his past was about his parting with his mother. You were also in the Tomb at the time, do you know anything about that?]

[Theta: It’s only to be expected… that child is extremely averse to talking about his family. Maybe part of it is because he’s worried how I’d feel…… and he’s had a hard time dealing with what happened with Frederica]

Frederica and Garfiel’s parting became final when he swiped away her hand as she left for the outside world.

As for why Garfiel stayed behind in the Sanctuary, perhaps it was to protect the residents who couldn’t leave, unlike his quarter-blood sister and himself, from the potential threats that might endanger them.

――And then, consistent with Echidona’s hint about Garfiel’s fear of the outside world, there was,

[Subaru: The trauma of his parting with his mother…… huh. He must hate the outside world. I was really kinda hoping he’d be able to help me out with a few things outside, though]

[Theta: Su-bo and Gar-bo fighting side by side…… hm. Mm, that does sound nice]

When she thinks of Garfiel, Theta’s smiling visage would lose all of its youthful impression, but simply overflow with maternal compassion for her grandson.

Perhaps, for the four of them playing the same role of Lewes, even if it resided within each of them separately, the emotion of familial love for Garfiel certainly existed.

And surely, Garfiel felt the same towards them.

[Subaru: ……Well, first I’ll need to find Emilia]

He must continue to prepare for the worst case in regards to Garfiel.

Now that he had sealed the contract with Roswaal―― with this being one of the victory conditions of the bet, his final confrontation with Garfiel was inevitable.

And the same went for Emilia breaking through the Trials, which Roswaal had deemed “Impossible”, but, aside from providing encouragements, Subaru would have to let her overcome that on her own.

When she lost her bond with Puck, Emilia had lost the supporting beam of her heart. And in exchange, the “Seal on her inadmissible memories” preventing her from truly facing the first Trial was removed.

Or at least it should be, if everything was going according to Puck’s plan. Once she accepts this fact and faces the Trial once more, she should be presented with a different scene.

Would Emilia still be able to give the same answer when that happens?

――Even though Natsuki Subaru could not be there with her in that moment, he had made it his duty to do everything in his power to make sure she does when the time comes.

[Subaru: I know you probably want to give Garfiel a hug right now, but could you stay here for a bit, Theta-san? Since that guy doesn’t want to come close to this place, we can keep him distracted for a little longer]

[Theta: And while Gar-bo’s attention is elsewhere, you’ll be up to some clever mischief, I assume?]

[Subaru: Why does everyone wanna refer to what I’m doing as “mischief” and “nefarious plotting”? Do you guys really see me as that kind of conniving scoundrel?]

Seeing Subaru tilt his head, Theta didn’t give an answer.

Slightly irritated by her silence, Subaru sighed and scratched his head.

[Subaru: So… am I still right to think that today’s the decisive day and tomorrow’s an extra……? If Emilia’s where I think she is, all that’s left to deal with is Garfiel and Roswaal]

Those two would be the final bottlenecks to achieving the Sanctuary’s victory conditions.

He and Otto had carefully planned to keep those two out of the way. But now, everything will depend on their timing, preparations, and how well they’ve done their job.

The more leeway in terms of timing and prep time they have, the better their chances will be. ――That much was obvious.

[Subaru: Whether we’re laughing or crying, we have to settle everything by the day after tomorrow. We can’t mess up at the critical moment. ……Right, Theta-san?]

[Theta: Even if you look at me for agreement, what do you want me to say? ――When a man’s resolve is all over his face, all that’s left is to go for it. I’ll be waiting with great expectations]

Without sharing in Subaru’s enthusiasm, Theta affirmed his intentions all the same.

The awkward smile on her face might very well have been something which often adorned Lewes Meyer’s face. Surely, that expression was one Beatrice knew well.

He would persuade Garfiel, support Emilia, and fetch Beatrice.

There was still much to be done, and many more obstacles to stand in his way.

Storm clouds were gathering overhead, with no easy answer to clear them all away.

Nevertheless, Subaru’s heart was strangely optimistic.

That’s because the things he needed to do were the same as the things he wanted to do.

No matter how difficult it would be to surmount the towering obstacles before his eyes, it was infinitely better than the time he’d spent utterly lost as to what to do.

At last, Subaru was ready to reach out towards that intangible thing named fate.

He pulled on his own cheeks, letting go with a snap as he pumped himself up.

Giving the wide-eyed Theta a smile and a little wave, Subaru headed for the building’s exit.

Then, with his hand on the door, he glanced back as if suddenly remembering something, and,

[Subaru: Actually, Lewes Meyer talked in a way that’s pretty normal for her age, so how come the replica Lewes-sans all talk like grannies? Is that like an acquired trait?]

[Theta: What’re you talking about? ――Don’t I talk in a way that’s completely normal for my age?]

With an indignant snort, Theta placed her hands on her hips and puffed out her flat chest.

But calling that a gesture suited for her age would surely be impossible.

Picturing the other girl in a dress who had passed the ages without the slightest growth in her body, Subaru left the building, bathed in the wind.

Holding onto that somewhat uplifting feeling, he turned to his final challenge.

――Natsuki Subaru’s fight to end the Sanctuary, and to birth it anew, had begun.

-=Chapter 104=-