Mark of the Fool

Chapter 794: Different Roles in Different Times of Life

This is why I don't like talking to old things who think they're above everything else, Professor Jules grumbled as she walked down the hall with Alex. Having a conversation with them is like trying to solve fifteen riddles at once, and their cleverly disguised tests are more annoying than amusing. Why cant they just speak plainly?

Yeah, I guess you're right Alex murmured, his brow furrowed in thought.

She glanced at him. Oh, don't tell me you're actually thinking about what he said?

I kinda am, he admitted. He is old and wise, the old devil, and I think there was something in the last thing he said. Recklessness and cautiousnessusing one or the other. What do you think that means?

It's a bunch of cryptic nonsense. She rolled her eyes. Meant less to teach you, and more to amuse himself.

Maybe Alex said. What's your take on his advice?

Which part?

About roles, and meeting them. About having proper mindsets, Alex said.

Oh, by the gods, that part, she grumbled. I've never heard so much drivel in my life.

What makes you think its drivel? Alex asked, looking around the hallway. It was quiet, and no one else seemed to be around, but he dropped his voice low all the same. His example of the peasant and king stuff, sorta hit home. Im the one who defines my strength, but he was right about mistaking my own truth for delusion. Lets say I was a peasant and went to my king and demanded that he hand over all of his coin. I imagine thatd be a great way of getting my head lopped off. But, if I was a king who started grovelling in front of a peasant, begging for favourswell, that's just gonna confuse people, right? I guess we do kind of have our rolesand I have to say it, I'm playing mine pretty welleven though Ive got mixed feelings about that. Uldar said that in every cycle, the five Heroes chosen were supposed to fit the traits he wanted each one to have. I was chosen as a Fool, but I actually have more traits of the General. Maybe I act too much like the Fool? What do you think?

I think this entire thing with roles and mindsets is just a pretentious way to say you should have common sense,Professor Jules said. Mr. Roth, you have to understand that old beings take perverse delight in turning the mundane into something strange and shrouded in mysticism and philosophy. I could sum up Hobbs entire speech with: your worlds changed very quickly, young man, and you should make sure that youve changed along with it.

I Alex paused. Huh, thats a lot easier to understand. Why didnt you say that before?

Because you both seemed to be having fun with your drama, she said dryly. And who am I to stop children from playing?

Alex felt his face flush. Well, I have to ask you, do you think I've changed properly? Along with my world, I mean?

She gave him an exhausted look. Mr. Roth. Please don't ask me to judge your actions or behaviour. Simply thinking about the dangers you throw yourself into exhausts me.

Oh, it cant be that bad, he said.

Cant be that bad? Professor Jules stopped dead in her tracks, eyeing Alex as though he was a dog that had suddenlyand without warningdiscovered the power of speech. Mr. Roth, one blessing that I have in life is that I am not related to you. If I were, I would have likely succumbed to at least three heart attacks within the last six months due to worry over your actions. That stunt with the Empire was insane, as were your trips to the hells and so on. You are just my student, not one of my children, but I feel like youve shaved at least ten years from my lifespan.

Uh, sorry Alex apologised.

Don't apologise, Mr. Roth. I know you're going to do it again, so words of caution are just a waste of my breath, she said. Ive learned that a certain kind of behaviour is just a part of you.

Okay, okay, fair, he said. But I still want your perspective, and I know you're just my professor, but honestly, youve been a great mentor to me. Your wisdoms really helped me, just like Baelins has. So please, do you think I've adjusted to being an archwizard or not?

She sighed. When I say that some people don't adjust to a changing world, I am more describing when people dont pay attention to what their reality actually is, and how it affects their lives. For example, if a minor aristocratic family falls into ruin, and finds themselves reduced to a similar lack of resources as the peasantry, they're either going to have to adjust their lavish spending or run headlong into disaster.

Professor Jules looked ahead as though staring across time. Ill tell you a little story about a friend I had when I was just a little older than you. She was someone who was very interesting and the two of us became fast friends. She spent her life adventuring, and was often hired by the university to obtain artefacts and materials for them. Well, with her success, came great wealth.

Right, he said. Sounds like adventuring and the nature of that, meant her life was pretty dangerous, maybe even reckless?

It was at times, Professor Jules said sadly. She paid little attention to her body as she grew older and it got slower. You see, a woman of fifty is not quite as nimble as the same woman thirty years earlier: climbing about in old ruins is how she eventually lost her life.

Oh jeez, Im sorry to hear that, Alex said.

Thank you, but that's not necessary, Mr. Roth, Professor Jules said, her nostrils flared and her body tensed. When she stumbled into a trap on one of her adventures, she had merely repeated a mistake shed made in the past. You see, when we first met, she had few friends. She and I often spoke of our childhoods and her years growing up as a street urchin, living among other children forced to make their way in a harsh world, one that naturally included poverty. At some point, they were approached by a group of travelling adventurers in need of someone to carry equipment on a dangerous quest to raid an ancient tomb. She was the only one who agreed to chance it, and the gamble paid off for her, though many of the adventurers were caught in a hidden trap and died. After that first job, she went from being a hireling to a full member of the group and they taught her what they knew about delving into lost places. She learned, and eventually, they joined the Delvers Guild. Her life was spent finding treasure, and risking her very soul in the darkest and most dangerous of places; tombs, caves, abandoned cities, they all came with various levels of threat. But, the reward for taking such risks was great material wealth.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

But maybe Alex said. In her mind, she was still the street urchin she once was.

Exactly, Professor Jules said. And when she went looking for her friends from those days, she acted much the same way, even though that was no longer who she was. Of the friends shed left behind, many were dead, and those who werent, wished they were. The way that she and them lived was now miles apart. They could no longer relate to each other, whether it was her fancy clothes, how she spoke and conducted herself, or the fine carriage she went about in. They demanded coinand when she gave itthey wanted more. And, when she was not giving it fast enough, they stole from her. She ignored the advantages shed gained in life, and how they had come to set herapart from her former group. She failed to adjust, just as she failed to adjust to her ageing body.

Right Alex said. And do you think that applies to me?

She scoffed. No. Honestly, if you began to act like some arrogant warlord, as Hobb seems to be suggesting that you should, I'd be incredibly disappointed in you, Mr. Roth.

Yeah, you don't seem to take much stock in wielding power, andother mighty wizard things, Alex smiled.

No, I do not, Professor Jules said, firmly. A lot of powerful wizards disagree with me, but in my opinion, wizards are still the same mortal, fallible people we were when we started our journeys. Just a little smarter, a little more learned, and a little more dangerous. Simply because we are able to wield powerful magic, doesn't mean we've transcended to become these different beings. While we have to be aware of what our new powers bringboth benefits and challengesallowing them to go to our heads, I believe, is a mistake.

Alex paused, as a thought occurred to him. Do you think that was Uldars mistake?

She looked at him curiously. What do you mean?

That he let his divinity go to his head?

She pursed her lips, looking up toward the ceiling in thought. Maybe. I think what he allowed himself to do speaks volumes. I've never been a goddess, Mr. Roth, and Im glad I never will be. Being a deity involves a certain responsibility that I think necessitates some change in the self and mindset. but I think Uldar overestimated his importance. He secluded himself because he didnt want to ask for help or admit vulnerability: he made horrible, monstrous decisions, because he thought himself key to your kingdoms future. Had he viewed himself a little differentlywith less bloated egoperhaps he would have been a kinder god. I don't know, all I know is that I am happy in my lab, with my beakers and flasks. The last couple of years have been entirely too exciting for me, and I can't wait for this all to be over.

Do you think we're gonna win? he asked.

I wish I could read the future and tell you a simple, yes, Professor Jules said. But, I honestly don't know. I feel a little guilty, thinking about it with such distance, but in the end, even if you failed to save your homeland, I know that Generasi will move on. There will be a lot of hand-wringing, and Id be brokenhearted, but that's because I care more about your future than having any attachment to your island.

That's understandable, Alex said. We can only care about so much, I suppose.

Very mature of you, Mr. Roth, she said. But in short, of course I hope we do win, but there are too many unknown variables. Things feel too quiet after the theft in the sanctumsomething feels off, but I cant say what that is. All I know is that Ill put in my work in the laboratory to try to make sure this menace ends forever.

And I'll be right there beside you, Alex said. Professor, what are you going to do when this is all done?

If the Ravener is defeated? she asked. Well, I'll continue doing what I was doing before, researching and teaching. That's what I love to do, and I do believe it's what I'll continue to do until I die.

He looked at her sharply. Professorare you happy? With your life, I mean. With your role as a professor, and an alchemist.

Happy? she asked. I guess I am, I feel fulfilled. Like I'm wearing the right pair of shoes.

What? Shoes?

Exactly. Making the wrong choice in life, Mr. Roth, is a lot like wearing the wrong pair of shoes. Sure, you can still walk, but it's going to be uncomfortable at first until eventually, it will hurt a lot. I feel like these shoes Im walking in were madefor me.

Right, Alex said. And howd you know how to pick the right shoes?

Are you asking because you're wondering how to pick yours? she asked.

Yeah he said. That whole thing with Hobb about roles has me thinking about my future even more. How do I know the right way to defeat the Ravener? What happens if we win? Or even if we lose, but I'm still alive? How did you know you wanted to be an alchemist?

Well, she said. It was as simple as me entering an alchemy lab one day. When I was in my youth, I wasn't particularly interested in wizardry, so, when it was recognised that I had mana, my family and I saw a mostly economic opportunity. An opportunity to improve all of our lives. And when I was accepted at the university, I had no idea which magical discipline I wanted to specialise in.

She sighed wistfully. Then, I walked into my first alchemy class.

And you loved it?

No, I hated it.

Really?

Oh yes, I was immediately struck by the horrific lack of proper safety protocols and thats when I knew I had found my calling. The things that I saw would have panicked the most ardent life enforcement practitioner, and over time, it felt like we were constantly playing with fire! she snorted. I began to advocate for changes, and spent every minute I could in my alchemy textbooks, looking for ways to keep myself safe. In the process, I learned that I loved the discipline, I loved to teach it, and wanted to make sure that others were safe when they performed it. In other words, I tried on the right pair of shoes, and they fit.

I see Alex said. Well, a lot of shoes feel rightand a lot feel wrong. Its confusing. I'm almost afraid of the future.

It will come, she said. Like it or not. Maybe ask some of your peers. You might gain insight into your own path through them.

Alex scoffed. I don't know if Hobb would like that: hed say they aren't my peers anymore.

And I'd say he can go right back to the hells where he came from, she snorted. You're a young man, and you're among friends. Talk to them, Mr. Roth. We don't know what's going to happenso talk to them while you can.

He thought about having to take Bjorgrund and Birger back to their cottage, as well as meeting with his cabal.

Thanks, Professor, he said. I think I'll do just that.