I Want to Slack Off at the Demon Bureau

When Chu Zhishui heard this, she was bewildered. During workdays, they went to and from the bureau together, and on weekends, they spent one day drinking tea in the courtyard. He practically occupied all her time, yet he somehow managed to express a resentment as if they hadn't seen each other for months.

She wore a pendant around her neck, and the small courtyard was filled with bamboo. She would appear at the mere mention of her name, yet listening to his tone, one would think they were in a long-distance relationship.

"This..." Chu Zhishui said embarrassedly, "How could I at the bureau..."

She was just doing her normal work routine - how could she suddenly hug and kiss him? It didn't seem right at all.

"You were at the bureau the other day, but what about now?" Xin Yunmao sneered. "What excuse do you have this time?"

"No, it's just... when you suddenly make such demands, I feel really awkward," Chu Zhishui held her head. "Shouldn't these things happen naturally? How can it be like punching a time clock?"

Their last time had been a moment of passion, purely instinctive, but now she was quite clear-headed and genuinely felt embarrassed.

Xin Yunmao sat silently on the stool, his brows slightly furrowed and lips pressed tight. He began scanning her with those pitch-black eyes again, wordlessly waiting for her to come over, otherwise just staring at her with reproachful eyes.

He wore a light blue short-sleeved shirt that revealed his smooth arm lines, his long fingers tapping lightly on his knee as if silently urging something. His skin gleamed white in the sunlight.

After long contemplation, Chu Zhishui, still red-eared, asked tepidly: "Why do I have to come to you?"

Why did he have to tell her to take the initiative? Now she felt caught between a rock and a hard place.

"Can I come to you instead?" he snorted. "Am I just here to be toyed with by you?"

"..."

This was ridiculous - he was so good at pinning the blame on her.

Chu Zhishui hesitantly spoke: "Have you ever considered that you're quite perverted, always having these thoughts about wanting to be played with..."

Xin Yunmao said irritably: "How many more excuses are you going to make!"

"Alright, alright, I'm coming, stop shouting." Chu Zhishui had to stand up. She cupped Xin Yunmao's face, feeling her own cheeks burning, awkwardly avoiding his gaze as she gave him a light kiss on the corner of his lips, and whispered, "There, happy now?"

"You're being so perfunctory—" Xin Yunmao raised his eyebrows, holding her hand to prevent her from leaving, persisting, "Is this how you are at work?"

Chu Zhishui snapped: "You're so annoying!"

Hearing her outburst, Xin Yunmao decided to tone it down a bit to avoid truly angering her. Just as he was about to let go of her hand, he felt his chin being grabbed, his face lifted decisively by her, causing his Adam's apple to bob slightly.

"Open your mouth, let's satisfy your perverted desires," she said.

The warm, sweet, moist sensation, her beautiful face so close - he closed his eyes in response, tilting his head back to surrender to her tenderness.

The familiar scent enveloped him, he could smell her subtle fragrance, the air in his lungs growing increasingly heated, their mingling breaths seeming to brew into scalding honey within their bodies.

He unconsciously reached out to embrace her, constantly pulling their bodies closer.

A hand steadied her waist, breaking the intoxicating dream. Chu Zhishui suddenly came to her senses, holding Xin Yunmao's shoulders and frantically pushing him away slightly: "Wait..."

He opened his eyes at her words, his pupils still gleaming with moisture, looking confused and bewildered.

Chu Zhishui, red-faced, stammered: "It's just... um..."

Xin Yunmao: "?"

"I don't really understand you demons, this kind of behavior..." she mumbled, "won't it cause you to be pollinated?"

"???"

Xin Yunmao's expression changed slightly, his ears, already warm from kissing, now turned bright red as he struggled to speak: "Polli..."

Chu Zhishui coughed lightly, explaining dryly: "Mainly because you're a plant, with pistils and stamens, different from humans. I just want to protect you properly."

"..."

Xin Yunmao felt that she sometimes had strange ideas about him - if she wasn't calling him delicate, she was wanting him to wear women's clothes and braid his hair, and now she was acting like she needed to take responsibility for him.

He was a tall, free-spirited, unbending bamboo, evergreen through all seasons and unafraid of severe cold, yet she always imagined him to be particularly delicate. Clearly, no matter how you looked at it, he should be the one taking care of her.

"Although demons in their original form have pistils and stamens, it's different from ordinary plants. We don't get pollinated just by the wind blowing - it has to be done with our human form..." Xin Yunmao explained embarrassedly, skipping over some key terms before continuing, "That's why I said before that flowering alone doesn't lead to seed formation."

If it was just flowering without the crucial step, seeds still wouldn't form.

Chu Zhishui timidly asked: "So that's about your pistils and stamens producing seeds..."

"No, it usually depends on the other person's gender, and then we choose how to use it. It could be me producing seeds, or not," Xin Yunmao glanced at her furtively, suddenly feeling his mouth dry, swallowing nervously, "Do you want to pollinate me?"

"No, I'm just trying to understand," Chu Zhishui hurriedly said, "You said producing seeds makes you weaker faster, so we should be careful about that."

She had always lacked knowledge about demon physiology and feared that just shaking him might result in pollination.

Xin Yunmao was silent for several seconds before suddenly asking: "If we don't consider that, would you want children?"

Chu Zhishui was surprised by his sudden question, staring at him in astonishment as he quietly waited for her answer.

"Although many people are against it, I had quite a happy childhood, so I want to experience being a parent. I even fantasized about having children without getting married," she pondered while speaking frankly, "But it's fine if you don't want to, it's not something that's necessary."

She wasn't interested in marriage before, but that didn't mean she wasn't interested in children. Blood relatives had long been her pillar of support, naturally making her wonder if she could be like Xie Yan and Chu Xiaohe as a parent.

However, Xin Yunmao was a demon - he had no blood relatives and hadn't experienced this, so it was normal if he didn't understand and didn't need to accept it.

Xin Yunmao fell silent upon hearing this, lost in thought before finally nodding: "I can accept it, and I can produce seeds."

Hearing his decisive response, Chu Zhishui was stunned: "No, even if you accept it, you don't have to produce seeds. You said producing seeds would..."

"What nonsense are you talking about?" Xin Yunmao gave her a sidelong glance, crossing his arms with quite an arrogant air, "Even if I become weaker from producing seeds, I'm still stronger than you. You're just a human without demon energy - you might die directly, while I use large amounts of demon energy to produce bamboo seeds."

She was weaker than him in every aspect except personality and spirit.

His eyes sparkled: "Besides, my seed production will give birth to a new god. We can create a god together - doesn't that sound interesting? With my demon energy and your thoughts and feelings, it might become a true god, far stronger than those appointed by heaven and earth."

Previously influenced by dragon flames, he had resisted the birth of new gods like that dragon, but now he had come to terms with it. If the bamboo seed experienced human life from childhood, experiencing life's myriad flavors like her, and then inherited his remaining demon energy, it might transform into a seed of "divinity."

Long ago, he knew he wasn't a god, but he could be a god-maker.

He was more excellent than heaven and earth, and if he did this with her, they might create a true god.

She was a person who kept her word, surely she would raise it well, letting it comprehend the many principles of the human world.

"This way, after a hundred years, we can give the demon energy to it, without having to release it all through flowering," Xin Yunmao said calmly. "I was originally worried about not using up all the demon energy."

Hearing these words, Chu Zhishui felt a tightness in her chest and asked in shock: "You originally..."

He spoke matter-of-factly: "Originally planned to bloom one final time. Although our starting points are different, we could reach the same endpoint - wouldn't that be perfect?"

Accompanying her in full bloom for a hundred years, then flowers blooming and falling - this was the ending he had long planned.

Although they couldn't share past years together, from now on they would share every minute and second, completely possessing all of each other, not just due to simple emotions but as a worship-like sacrifice of faith.

Or perhaps, plants should follow the changes of the four seasons - since there was a day of sprouting from the earth, there must naturally be days of withering and falling. No need to dwell on the future disappearance of leaves; just remember the current lush greenery.

They had intense, passionate love between man and woman, and something higher that transcended this love. It had nothing to do with gender or species, couldn't be accurately described in words, but just thinking about it made one's soul yearn and spirit surge, generating fearless courage to face any trial.

This life scorched him like a fierce fire, but pursuing the flow of Zhishui gave him the courage to be like a moth to the flame.

Facing his calm expression, Chu Zhishui felt a sting in her nose and suddenly found it hard to breathe. She spoke with a muffled voice, "Actually, you don't need to..."

Xin Yunmao replied unhurriedly, "This is my own choice. Even if you don't understand, I would still do this. Or rather, doing this is what will make me complete."

This was his journey of seeking the Way, transforming from human to deity, truly ascending to godhood.

"Over the past thousand years, I've witnessed countless humans. They believe that by endlessly pursuing money, power, and longevity, chasing after vague concepts of infinity, they would surely find happiness. However, they only end up with boundless suffering and misfortune. The more they have, the more they want; the more they possess, the more they fear losing it. They torture themselves and ultimately bring about their own downfall."

He wasn't a mortal; the world he envisioned was far more expansive.

Being fixated on infinity itself was still being confined to limitations.

"I won't do foolish things like that dragon, losing what's more important," he said with a slight tilt of his chin, smiling confidently. "Whether it's choosing believers or anything else, I go straight for perfection. Once I've experienced the most perfect version, I won't settle for anything inferior."

These words still carried the loftiness of a divine lord, yet they mysteriously brought moisture to her eyes. A sour and tender emotion fermented within her organs, like experiences of countless days and nights distilled into wine, bringing a tingling, warm sensation.

If she had ever been confused about whether she made the right choices, he was now affirming everything about her. Whether what she possessed or what she lacked, he comprehended all of her.

Seeing her reddened eyes, Xin Yunmao naturally opened his arms to her.

Chu Zhishui instinctively leaned into him, wiping her warm tears on his clothes to prevent him from seeing them.

Xin Yunmao stiffened at her embrace: "This is the first time I've seen you like this."

She rarely relied on him before, and now he was overwhelmed with joy at this favor.

Chu Zhishui buried her face against him, inhaling his familiar fresh scent of grass and wood, like a mighty tree standing in a storm – peaceful and serene despite the raging winds.

She mumbled, "But Zhumi will be pitiful, having no parents in the future."

Xin Yunmao was puzzled by her concern for the yet-to-exist Zhumi: "?"

"All mortals go through this; it's one of life's eight sufferings. Understanding this is necessary for achieving godhood," he immediately replied with displeasure, suddenly holding her tighter. "Why do you pity it? Why don't you pity me?"

"But you said I shouldn't pity you. I pitied the wrong person."

"..."

After a while, Chu Zhishui's emotions stabilized, but she remained nestled against him, feeling the coolness of the bamboo grove.

Xin Yunmao, with her leaning against him, stole a glance at her before looking away, inexplicably feeling shy. He casually asked, "So you're thinking that far ahead – does this mean you plan to create a deity with me?"

She had been peaceful until hearing these words, which startled her into raising her head: "??"

His eyes wavered as he tried to maintain a serious expression: "This is something even Heaven and Earth cannot accomplish."

She punched him, flushed with embarrassment and anger: "Stop saying such shameless things!"

Botany didn't lie to her – when bamboo blooms, not only do its leaves turn yellow, but it also publicly displays its amorous nature.