Chapter 169 I Might Need To Use The Bathroom
"Alright, Jack. Say's here that you are an Astro Mechanic and that you worked for NASA before this?" I asked, and the broad-chested man with a shaved head and big beard nodded.
"Yup. Bunch of idiots, if you ask me, and just in the business of covering things up! Did you know that we have never been to the moon? Fancy cover-up! All shot in a studio!" Jack Landing declared, and I blinked at him.
"Really? Are there actually aliens in area fifty-one?" I asked, but only half as a joke.
"Of course there are! They have a couple different-"
"Wait! Are you actually serious?! Like, If I go there right now, will there be something for me to find?!" I asked to cut Jack off and make him step back.
"Yeah, I have seen them! There even got some alien tech and craft! Been to that place a few times!" Jack laughed, leaning into me with a big grin.
"Do you wanna go right now?" I asked, leaning in with a child-like smile.
"I thought you would never ask! Give Binder and me here a System, and we can leave right now!" Jack exclaimed with a child-like joy that matched my own.
Seriously, this was the coolest thing I had heard that wasn't to do with Systems. Looks like I was going to have to see if Sofia wanted to go on a bit of a trip first. The last thing I wanted to do was piss her off after telling her I was going to spend the entire day with her.
"Papi! I am back, and I need a foot rub, so it is in good shape to shove up that Niñitas arse!" Sofia snapped as she came waltzing into the room.
"Ha! Speak of the devil!" I said, whirling around on Sofia, who scowled at me.
"That is not funny, Papi," Sofia said in a low growl, her golden slipper magically in her hand and cocked.
"Cha, Cha, Hermosa! I didn't mean it like that! Want to go for a trip?" I asked, putting my hands up in defense, but then tipped my head. "How did you run into Aiko again? You came up and got the others and took them down."
"I thought that I would be nice! I thought, you know, maybe I might stop by and see how she was doing!" Sofia growled, waving her slipper around dangerously. "Then! That little tart locks me out! Papi, then she stuck her tongue out at me... I am going to kill her. That's it! I am going right now, don't even try to spot me!"
"Wait, you crazy woman!" I shouted, and Sofia threw her sandals at me.
It hit me flat on the face with about as much effect as a piece of paper, but now Sofia looked pissed at me. Better than Aiko, but the two of them were going to have to learn how to get along if they were going to be working in the same building.
"Call me crazy again," Sofia growled.
"I would like to vote on another course of action. That one looks a bit too risky. I personally would like to see the sunrise tomorrow!" I said as Sofia marked up to me to push her nose into mine.
"Where do you want to go? Is it more important than getting rid of these last two so we can go do what I want?!" Sofia growled, but I kissed her and wrapped my arms around her.
"Hermosa, how would you like to go to area fifty-one?" I asked, and my little Spanish flower just blinked cutely at me, which considering the last ten reactions, was a good one.
"The place where they keep all the aliens?" Sofia asked curiously, and I nodded.
"Yes, and all the alien tech that has been collected over the years. On the way back, we can stop at Fort Knox on the way home!" I said, and Sofia started to smile and cuddled into me.
"Oh, don't talk so dirty to me like this when other people are around!" Sofia said and then leaned up to my ear and said, not whispered, "If you get me all that gold, I won't need a safe word.
"Is it getting hot in here?" Binder asked, and I laughed, looking back at the two men that were looking a bit awkward.
"Sorry guys, let's wait till we get to the place to give you all Systems. I also want you to come with us, Binder. You have experience in Energy Weapons. I think there might be some things there that might give you both some inspiration. That will help me give you the best Systems," I explained, and they nodded.
"Yeah, I am pretty excited to go back! The rest of the people there are scared shitless that the government would kill them if they even talked to me! It was quiet and boring without anyone to talk about what I saw. Since no one would believe the stuff that I saw there, I have always just been a loner, but things are different now!!" Jack explained excitedly and then out a booming belly laugh.
"I am also interested in this place, the fifty-one that is said to hold many secrets! It is true that I would be very interested in coming to see a place like this!" Binder said, but he adjusted his glasses. "Though, from what I have learned about the palace, it is heavily guarded."
"We have Papi. There is nothing that is stronger than him in this world," Sofia said, resting her head on my chest, still hugging me.
"How are we going to get there? Nevada is not a short trip! Neither is Kentucky!" Jack exclaimed, and I nodded.
"Don't worry about that part. I can do some pretty crazy things," I said and then gestured to the elevator. "Let's head up to the top, and then I will change into a jet."
"Oh, you are "just" going to change into a ship?! Just?! Why do you talk about this like it is nothing?!" Jack exclaimed, and Sofia looked up from my chest.
"First rule of being part of my army is that you no longer get to assume something can be done! Anything that we can do, Daniel can probably do better given enough time. We are the only limit to our potential, and questioning, if something isn't possible is not helpful. You should only be asking why it won't work and how you can make it!" Sofia declared, and Jack grinned.
"You got it, Hentia Lady!" Jack said, giving Sofia a salute that made her growl in my arms.
"If this is your army, what are you going to call us?" Binder asked curiously, and I looked down at Sofia with a grin.
"Yeah, I am more than curious to know what you picked," I grinned, and Sofia rolled her eyes.
"It was supposed to be Sofia's Golden Army! That was what I picked, but it seems that no one wants to use my name! So! We will be The Golden Army of The Hentia Goddess!" Sofia growled.
"Hey! That is pretty good, better than the first. It was too plain, but this one really screams you!" Jack laughed, but the wall behind him opened up.
Sofia let go of me, walked over, grabbed Jack, and unceremoniously tossed him out the opening.
I just stood there stunned, and Sofia turned to Binder, who put his hands up, stepping back.
"Do you have any funny comments?" Sofia asked in a low voice, and Binder shook his head.
"No ma'am! I think your choice is good, but I have nothing more to say!" Binder exclaimed, backing into a table.
As he did, Mr. Tree brought Jack back up into the tree, but the man looked pale. Once the root set him down, Jack gave me a pained look, but not of one injury. Nope, this one was one of those mistakes that have been made looks.
"I think I might need to use the bathroom...." Jack said in an uneasy voice, but then the smell hit me.
"Just head to the elevator, and you will be guided where you need to go, and new pants will be given," I said, turning away and putting my hand up to my face to cover my nose.
"Next time, you will think about making a funny comment!" Sofia growled, and Jack nodded slowly as he put a hand on the back of his pants as started to waddle to the elevator.
Once Jack was gone, I turned to Sofia, the Tree closing behind her.
"Was that necessary?" I asked, not made, just curious.
"I can place a bet that he won't make another stupid comment like that again! I wish I would have done that to that Niñita!" Sofia growled, and I grinned and then looked at Binder.
"Unless you like wingless flying lessons, I suggest you take this experience as food for thought. I am sure that you are better mannered than most, but still treat this as a friendly reminder that I will not get in between her and you all," I explained, and Binder nodded.
"No, I quite understand! I think he deserved it, but I will take note of this and store it away, so I don't have to try the same trip!" Binder chuckled, and I grinned.