Gardenia of Blooming Desire

Chapter 133: Returning the Sunflower

Ramuja could feel his arms were gripped by Young Lord's delicate hand, he could feel soft petals touching his lips. With his instinct, Ramuja stretched his hand and encircled Aster's body to bring him closer to his embrace. Ramuja's body had become big and strong after arduous work and training for years. Thus, Aster's body was completely swallowed in Ramuja's embrace.

Ramuja embraced his master until there was no gap between their chest. 

Aster shivered, he could feel Ramuja's heartbeat melt together with his. Their heartbeats moved with the same tempo to create a harmony, Aster could feel Ramuja deepened his kiss. He tried to step back, but Ramuja's hug became tighter. It was like a bear hug, very stiff, but warm indeed.

Slowly, Aster opened his eyes and he saw Ramuja's deep and gentle eyes staring at him. There was a hint of possession in his eyes, but it wasn't harsh or cruel like Charles.

Ramuja's gaze was very gentle, yet very hot. It melted Aster's body slowly and he let Ramuja take control.

Ramuja saw his master's eyes had turned golden. Somehow, when he saw those golden eyes again, there was a deep emotion swirling inside his heart. It made him want to possess his master, wanting to engrave himself deeply into his master's eyes, wanting everything about his master.

'Young Lord, you make me want to go wild. But I don't want you to get hurt, at least not by me'

Ramuja never wanted to hurt his master. He didn't want Aster to feel hurt after all what he had experienced. That was why Ramuja deepened the kiss gently. He kissed the petals and bit them one by one until there were only a few chrysanthemum petals left. Their lips almost touched.

Aster could feel Ramuja's heavy breath touching his skin and something big and long, like a stick, poked his belly. He finally reacted and struggled as hard as he could.

Ramuja was surprised, because his Young Lord suddenly struggled after their lips almost touched. But he loosened his embrace so Young Lord wouldn't get hurt.

Aster's face was beet red, he looked at the chrysanthemum who fell to the ground, then his eyes darted towards the thing between Ramuja's thigh.

"YYYour thing is poking me" Aster mumbled.

Ramuja finally noticed what was wrong, he closed his private part with both of his hands to no avail. Ramuja also blushed and lowered his gaze, "PPardon your servant's inappropriate thought, Young Lord."

"It's okay, I was just surprised," Aster said.

In fact, it wasn't the only reason why Aster struggled. Ramuja bit the petals one by one until the petals had fallen off and their lips almost touched. Ramuja almost performed the 'Gardenia Kiss'.

The fallen petals symbolized the struggle they went through until they were united into one deep kiss. It was a kiss performed only by a married couple. As someone who held the tradition strictly, Aster needed to stop it.

'At least not now'

Aster glanced at his servant who still looked down at his private part, trying to cover it with his hands although it was almost impossible to do. They were stuck in this very awkward silence and waited until that thing calmed down.

Aster and Ramuja finally stared at each other's eyes again. Aster cleared his throat and resumed the supposed line that he planned to deliver here, "RRamuja, you know about flower kiss?"

"Yes, Young Lord. It's a kiss performed by close friends or siblings, the flowers also symbolize something"

"Then, do you know why I picked a yellow chrysanthemum?"

"This servant doesn't know, Young Lord."

Aster smiled, "Ramuja, yellow chrysanthemum symbolizes neglected love. It is a sad flower, but I picked it because I want you to understand something."

Aster's cheek turned reddish again, but he didn't lower his gaze now. He wanted his servant to understand this, "I kissed you with it because I want you to understand that I do not neglect your love. I want you us to be connected with your worry. Do not woe over your love towards me, I do not neglect it."

Aster stepped forward, he boldly declared, "Ramuja, I recognize and accept your love."

"YYoung Lord, does this mean?"

Aster sighed and shook his head slowly, "I accept it, but I'm not saying that I will be your partner."

Ramuja felt like a hot knife stabbed his heart. It was so painful that he forgot to breathe for a few seconds. His eyes were red and tears slowly streamed down on his cheeks.

'In the end, everything means nothing. I still can't have him.'

Aster had expected this would happen. He stepped forward again and wiped Ramuja's tears with his delicate fingers, "Don't cry, I do not reject you, right?"

"But Young Lord, you cannot be my partner, that that means you rejected me" Ramuja said, he was sobbing like a child. Which almost shook Asters resolve. But this was for the safety of Ramuja until everything was settled.

"Ramuja, I'm here to give you this" Aster took out the dried-out sunflower that he hid inside his shirt. Aster fiddled with the ugly petal tenderly, he remembered when Ramuja had to run for hours at midnight in order to get a freshly picked sunflower. He went out at one and returned at four in the morning, only to get a good sunflower to symbolize his loyalty to Aster. It was stupid to do that, but Ramuja probably didn't realize how adorably dumb he was.

Ramuja immediately recognized this sunflower. It was the one he gave to Young Lord months ago. Ramuja stared in horror.

'If Young Lord returned this to me, does it mean that he rejected my loyalty too?'

"Young Lord what is the meaning of this?"

Aster gave a small smile and kissed the dried out sunflower, "I want to return this to you because I don't have anything else that can symbolize the depth of my loyalty. Ramuja, my sincerity, my love and loyalty for you is the same as what you've given me. Our feelings are mutual."

Ramuja accepted the sunflower, he was unsure about Young Lord's answer.

If the feelings are mutual Why can't we be lovers now?'

Aster realized what Ramuja would ask next. Aster chuckled, he tiptoed again and whispered to Ramuja's ear, 'Wait a bit more, then we can be together, okay?'

Aster kissed Ramuja's cheek. And then turned his back and left the garden, leaving the stunned Ramuja behind.

Ramuja was dazed. He didn't want to touch his cheek, because he was afraid that Young Lord's kiss would be wiped off his cheek. He kept repeating what his master said, "Wait a bit more..."