Chapter 339 - Then Try Harder, Feng
"Since you can't even trust me this once with your secret, then what is the need to say that we are friends? What is even the need that I came here to check up on you when you don't appreciate it?" Su Jin asked as he walked to where he had kept his bag and suit.
"From this day onwards Yifeng, not only have you lost the woman who went through so much to be with you but you have also lost the best friend who has always stood by you. The best friend who could go against the entire world for you. The one who won't relent in letting you have the woman he loves just because you love her," Su Jin said, as he fought back the urge to cry.
"You have lost the two most precious people in your life not because of anyone, but because of your selfishness. We will become friends again when you learn to trust me," Su Jin said, as he stared at Yifeng who had been quietly glancing at him.
"Goodbye, Li Yifeng and well done for successfully driving away those who truly loved you," Su Jin said as he picked his suit and bag and afterwards turned to leave. He approached the exit without looking back.
"Jin, I will tell you what really happened that day so, please don't leave. You are the only person I have now and I don't want to lose you too," Yifeng said soberly when Jin was just about to open the door.
"It is good that you have realised that I am the only one by your side and who will always stand by you," Jin said firmly, as he turned around and walk to the couch.
After they were both seated, Yifeng went on to narrate the incident that happened that day. It took him thirty minutes to conclude his story. At the end of his narration, Su Jin was left dumbstruck. He stared at Yifeng like this was his first time seeing him.
"Feng, why didn't you thoroughly explain everything to Zi Er? I am so certain that she would not have bear to leave if you had said all you told me to her. Although she would still be angry, I am sure she would have understood why you did what you did," Su Jin said seriously.
"I guess I am just stupid. Just like you said earlier, I am the reason she left. I shouldn't wallow in self-pity since I caused everything but I can't help but feel heartbroken each time I recall that she is gone. She hates me so much to the point that she didn't say goodbye. Maybe, she never loved me just like she said....,"
"Feng, you know that is not true. Although she never said I love you to you, I am a hundred per cent certain that Zi Er loved you as much as you loved her. Her actions and words said it all so I believe you must have felt her love for you too, even without her voicing it out," Su Jin said, as he tapped him by the shoulder.
"Jin, about what you said earlier about loving Zi Er...,"
"Let me get you something to eat," Su Jin said, as he immediately exited the room. From the looks of it, Yifeng could see that he was trying to ignore the topic.
"If Jin was the one who ended up with Zi Er, I am sure he would have done a better job in taking perfect care of her. He would have treated her like the queen that she is. He wouldn't have heartlessly left her shattered as I did. I guess my failure is my karma for always breaking ladies heart in the past," Yifeng mumbled as he covered his face with his palms. On removing his hand from his face, he sighted where Jin had dropped his wine at a table at the far end of the room. He went and took the bottle of wine. He opened it and poured the wine down his throat.
"After what I did I guess I don't deserve to be loved," Yifeng mumbled as he sat back down on the couch. When Su Jin came back and met the empty bottle on the table, he was speechless. He was confused on whether to comfort or scold Yifeng for taking the wine he confiscated.
Su Jin who was also in pain joined him in drinking. They drank until they passed out in his bedroom.
....
Six months after Yang Zi left, Yifeng still indulged in drinking and because of his constant drinking habits, the company he had worked so hard to build, suffered a great deal. The once elegant and handsome CEO Li became so haggard like one who had been neglected for a long time.
Su Jin who could no longer watch as Yifeng continued to waste his life went to his mansion that fateful night with the hopes of talking senses into his friend head. When he reached the Mansion, he wasn't surprised to see the already drunk Yifeng still drinking.
"Feng, why are you punishing yourself like this? It has been six long months since she left so why can't you pull yourself together? I am not saying you should forget about her but at least go back to your normal life. Can't you do that much, Feng?" Jin, who just sat down on a couch opposite Yifeng asked fiercely.
"Jin, on this day six months ago, Zi Er and I would have gotten engaged. I was so eager to make her my wife and the mother of my children so, I am sure we would have gotten married before today. And perhaps, a little bun would have already been residing inside her now but unfortunately, none of these things happened. Zi Er and I never got engaged, not to mention us getting married," Yifeng said dejectedly as he gulped down the content of the glass wine. He poured the wine into the glass once again.
"I miss her so much Jin. My heart hurts terribly each time I recall the circumstances that made us part ways. I have tried my best to find her during these past six months but after searching for so long, it seems like Zi Er disappeared into thin air. She knew that I would definitely search for her, that is why she hid so well from me," Yifeng said as he poured the content of the glass into his mouth.
"In the condition you are right now, nothing I said will enter into that thick skull of yours so you need to sober up," Su Jin said furiously, as he stood up and head towards the direction of the kitchen. He came back two minutes later with a big bowl containing water in it.
The drunk Yifeng was too engrossed with his wine to know what his friend was up to. The next thing he felt was a cold water splash all over him. He raised his gaze and shot Jin a murderous glance afterwards.
"Are you now sober or do you want me to pour you another bowl of water for you to get completely sober?" Su Jin asked fiercely, as he threw the white bowl on the floor.
"Feng, do you perhaps delude yourself into thinking that destroying yourself along with the company will make Zi Er less angry with you? Do you stupidly think that this how she wants to see you?" Su Jin asked in annoyance.
"Do you think that Zi Er will want to date a drunkard and a smoker like you?" Su Jin asked fiercely.
"Wake up Li Yifeng, because the Zi Er we both know will reject you without batting an eyelid if you possess such traits. You know just how much she hates the smell of cigarette and yet you still dare to smoke each time. Do you really want to lose her forever that is why you are doing all this?" Jin scolded sternly.
"What do you want me to do Jin? No matter how hard I try to concentrate I just can't since my thought is preoccupied with her. I think about her every second and hour of the day. My body calls and yearns for her, my heart and body doesn't listen to what my brain...,"
"Then try harder, Feng! Let her thought be your motivation to work hard. Think about the limit she had wanted you to reach when she was around and strive to attain that limit, Feng. I am sure Zi Er will be very glad when she comes back and see that you a better version of your old self. I am sure she won't resist falling in love again with you all over again. Or isn't that what you want?" Su Jin asked mellowly.
"Of course, I want Zi Er to love me again. When she comes back, I will stop at nothing to make sure she loves me once again," Yifeng said soberly.