Collide Gamer

Chapter 164 – His girlfriend couldn’t possibly land this soon.

Level 1 of Elementalist took just about the whole day to grind out. The Challenges ranged from the simple numbers game of spending 20000 mana, to very specific stuff, like using a combo attack of Salamander and Undine to boil an enemy to death in exactly one minute (he got an Achievement called ‘instant monster’ for that – it didn’t give him anything). It was harder than expected and yet not hard at all. The typical early kind of ‘challenge’ in video games, which were more time investments and usage of basic understanding than demands of proof of skill. Anyway, he had the level now.

“Well, let’s see what I can get you pretties,” John said and moved in to click the button.

“A GUMMY BEAR!” Sylph shouted into his ear with the power of a thunderclap. It was not a metaphor.

John’s eardrum ruptured and he was blown to the side. Almost, he flew off the bridge of the Demon Instant Dungeon. Luckily, Gnome stood between him and the railing and so he stumbled into her instead. The impact was hard and very uncomfortable, except for the two squishy hills of Gnome’s breasts.

While John was rubbing his ear in the knowledge that his eardrum would get repaired in about two seconds he was wondering about two things. “Sylph…did you just use magic to create sound?” he wanted to know.

“Maybe?” Sylph answered and stemmed her hands into her hips as she stood in the air. “My righteous gummy bear desire has granted me this new power,” she exclaimed and then pointed at John, “as a reward for this new development I demand a cookie!”

“Not a gummy bear?” John made sure.

“A cookie, a gummy bear and a satellite,” Sylph repeatedly wagged her finger at him, using her newfound power to create comedic SWISH SWUSH noises as she did. It was more likely that she had always possessed that power and just never realized it until that point.

John chose to not indulge Sylph any further. “Thanks for catching me, Gnome,” he instead turned to the stone elemental, who gestured wildly.

“I-it was nothing!” she stated, “I just happened to be there and, and, and well, and that!” She blushed harder than the situation justified, folding her hands in front of her chest.

“A question,” John said, noticing the motion. He leaned forwards a bit to look Gnome into her hazel eyes from face to face. “You need to concentrate to be ‘soft’ right?” he asked a rhetorical question. He already knew that was the case so he just continued. “Do you keep your boobs soft at all times?”

Sylph’s tirade in the background came to an end as she flew over. Salamander was quicker in the bullying game however. “Oh? Always ready to be fondled, are we?” she cackled and flew around Gnome’s head, from the left ear to the right and back. “What? Does stern big sister Gnome have problems controlling her desires? Are you ashamed?”

The fact that Gnome’s floor focused eyes were trembling was all the answer they needed. She kneaded the edge of her skirt when Undine’s head suddenly appeared from between her legs. The slime girl, having stealthily flowed down there, was now showing a calm smile as her head reformed between Gnome’s kneecaps. “No panties,” is all she had to say.

Gnome opened her mouth to protest loudly, when Mono stepped between her and John. Her arms protectively wrapped around the so adorably easily bullied rock, the artificial support cried, “You guys are the worst!”

“Monoooooo!” Gnome cried and returned the hug, burying her head on the monochrome girl’s shoulder, “They are so meaaaaan.”

Mono patted the stone elemental's head, “There, there, all will be fine.”

“Uwuwuwuwuwu,” Gnome sniffed as the artificial support, glaring daggers at everyone, protected and petted her until she had calmed back down.

John smiled at the scene. It was what he had imagined when he had made Mono. Despite her intense reactions, Gnome did not really hate the bullying (her reactions would have been more violent if she did). That being said, having her retreat in Mono was working well.

With the numerous sounds of bantering haremettes in the background, John got his first Elementalist Perk.

‘The shadow elemental is tempting me,’ John joked to himself but he knew that he wouldn’t take that option. He had enough elementals as it was, his party formation was stable and sacrificing even more of his mana was not an option he wanted to take at this point. If he ever went with that it would need to be at a later date. Elemental Bolt was out for a similar reason, he already had Mana Ray and for elemental damage he could always just give mana to the elemental girls or use Mana Blade. That only left Permanent Bond.

“Just so we are clear,” John warned everybody after sharing the decision with them. “You plop into existence in the middle of the street and I die.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Salamander waved his worries off. “We would die right with you in that case. Stop hesitating and just do it.”

“Never will I stop worrying with you around,” he returned flippantly, but pressed the button anyway.

The result was essentially nothing. His Mana Regeneration was freed of a minor tax, as everyone’s corporeal costs dropped by 0,5%. Better check what the scaling on those bonuses were.

“Okay, I can forget about levelling that, nice cockblock Gaia,” John complained. Twenty minutes? How would anyone do that? Questions for later.

While the elemental Stats increase and Mana Share Cost Reduction were both interesting, the summon discount was the best part about all of this. It applied to the incorporeal cost, pushing it down to 0,95% of his mana regeneration and as the cost was doubled for making them manifest it reduced it to 1,90% percent.

‘Basically after 20 levels it will be free,’ John concluded. Sounded great on paper, then he realized that it would take him to be level 200 to get enough Class Levels to get there. That was assuming that he wouldn’t spend the class levels anywhere else, which was already wrong.

‘Getting it down to 1% per elemental while corporeal would be pretty good though,’ he thought and closed all the windows, ‘That’s an amount I barely have to think about.’

He checked the time. It was around 11 PM and Rave still had not called. Did something happen? He doubted it, the only force around Springfield still hostile towards Rave was the Golden Rose and Moira just wasn’t the type to actually attack her. Even if she did, at this point Rave had gotten so many levels from grinding with him, she would probably win their rematch. John wasn’t absolutely sure, as he had no real information on the Warden’s abilities, but he thought the chances were fairly high.

He was about to put the phone away again when it ringed all of a sudden. The unexpected, loud noise made him jump and he dropped the device, only to immediately attempt to catch it. After a few seconds of panicked juggling, he got a firm grip and accepted the call. “Yes, hello?”

“Where is my update, Newman?” Lydia asked from the other side.

“The day is almost over, I demanded to be kept up to date,” her iron-clad strictness made John feel like he was standing trial. However, there was little that he was afraid of. So far, Lydia had only ever shown herself to be a demanding person, not a cruel one.

“Haven’t heard anything myself, sorry,” John answered. There was silence, a disapproving piano melody played in the background, repeated deep, long tones intermingling with sharp, short ones. “Sorry, princess,” he added and got a slightly appeased sigh in response. The piano music he heard changed to a balanced song.

“Is that so? You best find solid information on your girlfriend’s plans posthaste,” then Lydia ended the call. John didn’t even have time to lower the phone before it rang out in fully turned-up audio again. ‘Like my eardrum didn’t just get tortured by Sylph,’ he lamented and took that call.

“Ey, John!” Rave greeted in a tired yet enthusiastic tone, “Sorry, I was stuck in all kinds of hurries and stuff and now I will be in Cologne in about…3 hours.”

“What?!” John exclaimed, and panicked a bit, “Could your timing be any worse? The princess will have my ass for that, Jane!”

“Nice!” she laughed, and stopped when he did not join. “…Oh, you are serious,” there was an awkward pause where she giggled, then followed it up with, “I just want to see ya as soon as possible, ya know?” Just like that the panic was done and replaced with that flowery feeling that he got when he was with her, one that he hadn’t known just how much he missed until that very moment.

“Yeah, I know,” he answered in a voice as soft as clotted cream, “I am on my way, I will see you there!”

“Promise?”

 “Promise!”

The call was over and John turned to his group, “We will murder through this like we have never done before!” he announced and they started running.

The good old strategy of clearing the towers with the most effective tactic was tossed out in favour of indiscriminate violence. They advanced as quickly as possible through the tenth floor of the Demon dungeon. John spied the Secret Room, but he had no Revealer of Secrets so he just had to sprint on.

They were out-levelling the content by 5 levels so all of this wasn’t exactly a challenge. However, the boss they eventually found, a bloated blob of liquid corpses, John had never faced before. Throwing caution to the wind he just went with the good old tactic of tank and spank. He didn’t even pay a lot of attention to the mechanics, there were some small blobs, some crawling corpses. His gamer senses told him to kill the big blobs and ignore the small ones unless absolutely necessary.

Saying that the boss fight was easy would be unfair. Saying that it was quick was also untrue. However, John, with the upcoming reunion with the love of his life in mind, did not care about most of what was going on and, when the boss finally dropped dead, he even ignored the Loot, leaving the I.D. immediately.

‘Okay, next problem,’ John thought as he hastened down the stairs, throwing a jacket and scarf over himself. ‘How the fuck do I get there in time?’ He could run the whole distance, but he barely knew the way so he would need to ask and he wouldn’t be in time even if he ran the whole way anyway.

“What is going on?” Herman shouted from the couch.

“Jane is going to be here in about two hours!” John shouted, changing his comfy sneakers for winter boots (bought with money he had borrowed from Herman).

“Oh, nice… wait you are going to the airport? You know that’s too far to run, right?”

“I’ll take a cab or something.”

“You will have to hope that it arrives here in time…” the apothecary reminded him, “I will drive you there.” “You have a license that works here?”

“Yes.”

“And a car?”

“Yes.”

John stared at Herman. “Dude, you are a lifesaver!” the Gamer exclaimed and hugged the guy.

“It’s my job,” the apothecary, a bit surprised by the sudden outburst of emotion, said.

“Right, right.” John pulled back, a slight metallic scent in his nose.

“I will meet you outside,” Herman assured him and went upstairs to get his stuff.

A few minutes later they were driving towards the airport. Which worked for the longest time but then the reality of inner-city traffic hit them and they were slowed down tremendously. Enough to make John nervous that they wouldn’t make it in time. It didn’t help that he was currently waiting for the princess’ answer to his text about the timing. He knew that she was probably not amused but even an aggressively worded text would have been better than the current silence.

They had been on their way for about two hours, the German radio in the background playing classical music, when John’s eyes spied a certain something – lights in a street that was all dark. “Do you think we can make it if we stop for a moment?” he asked.

Herman eyed the traffic light that had just switched to red. “We won’t be able to find a parking spot around here, no,” he answered.

John had made up his mind however, damned be the few people in traffic behind him, it was time for some selfishness. “I will be back in a second!” he promised and stormed out of the car door.

He quickly manoeuvred himself through two parked cars and towards the very odd flower shop that still was open at this ungodly late hour on a Friday. He stormed inside and spoke to the first and only person around.

She was a blonde in her early to mid-twenties. Her hair was of peculiar fashion, extremely full in volume at the top, it curved backwards and created a mass of hundreds of strands, like a golden wheat field in the wind. At the back, however, it fell down in a straight streak of gold. When she tilted her head, her hair followed, the motion slower than one would have thought.

John hesitated for a moment, the beautiful blonde’s blue eyes seemed weird in a way that he couldn’t describe. How she blinked as their stare continued, how her hair moved, how she was completely still, without the slightest jitter, and how her decent sized chest rose with each breath, all of that seemed off. The plain white of her dress was just a little too white. Rather than like pure snow or porcelain, it felt like it was colourless in its entirety. It stuck to her, long and flowing, despite the lack of shoulder straps. Her entire back was revealed.

She just didn’t seem to belong where she was.

John tried to Observe her and was rewarded for the effort with a little pang of pain. The weirdness in the air intensified. He switched to aura sight for a moment, and confusingly found her to not even have the slightest hint of mana within her. All of this was a mystery he did not have time for and something about her just made him wish to be somewhere she wasn’t – despite how pretty the lithe woman was.

“I need pretty flowers,” he said the possibly dumbest thing imaginable in this situation.

Surprisingly the unnatural girl just nodded, took up a crimson camellia and handed it to him. “Take one,” she offered in a voice so calm it was almost empty. Then she pointed at the door, indicating that she didn’t want his money.

John was not exactly sure what was going on right now but he had no more time anyway. He stormed back outside and into the car. He closed the door just in time for Herman to start driving as the traffic light switched.

They had a surprisingly smooth way to the airport from there. They stopped near the main entrance, several cars behind them. “I will search for a parking spot, just jump out,” Herman said; John nodded and jumped out of the car, leaving Mono and Herman to it. He was 20 minutes late, but Rave also needed to check-out and all of that, so maybe he would be on time.

And, as luck would have it, he was.

Rave stepped out into the main hall of the airport, just as John ran into it. Long brown hair, her disguise, reached to her shoulder. Blue eyes scanned for him, longingly. Neon-green headphones covered her ears and a yellow, fuzzy jacket the rest of her, barely hinting at the curves underneath. She stepped further into the busy hall, not realizing she had been spotted. When she did, both of them accelerated in their steps, miraculously making it through the constant buzz of the airport without a single stop.

They didn’t have any words; their first instinct was just to embrace each other and kiss. Lips meeting for the first time in over two months, they pressed tightly against one another. The sweet smell of peppermint gum filled John’s nostrils, his lungs, and then his entire world with colour. The busy noises all around John were drowned out by the feeling of her heartbeat on his chest and the steady rhythm from her headphones.

All was right with the world.