I Decided to Not Compete and Quietly Create Dolls Instead

After defeating the puppeteers attack, I fell into a heavy sleep. I just knew Id be safe with the Earl and Kajero near me, so I could relax and sleep in peace.

But then, I had a strange dream. I was there. The original Altirea that is, the one without any memories of modern Japan.

She was a single-minded and straightforward person that had a sad future ahead of her.

The appearance of Ruthe, the heroine, the ideal self that Altirea envisioned I couldnt be calm in front of her. The overflowing emotions couldnt be held back. They twisted my mind, distorted my thoughts, and eventually, led to my collapse. I lost the few friends that I had, was abandoned by my fiance, Elstat And as if that wasnt enough, my father, Solute, was assassinated, and Altirea was hunted down too.

Being crushed by her own despair, she made one choice To kill Ruthe, and then herself.

I picked up fathers keepsake sword and went to the place where Ruthe called me to with the Lets Make up letter To the backyard of the academy, in the middle of the night.

In that place where nobody could see us, Ruthe was there. She smiled from the bottom of her heart when looking at me. She wished for reconciliation after all those years where we didnt have a proper talk Her soft expression was the very definition of a saints smile.

No one is watching, so Its okay, isnt it? As Ruthe said that, she removed the pale pendant on her neck. The magic surrounding her appearance and voice melted and we once more looked just like we had been in the past The her and the I that were like two peas in a pod. A mirror match.

But I wasnt happy seeing her like that.

Ruthe was in the center of a warm circle of people. She had become more and more beautiful, and her mere presence illuminated the area even in this moonless night.

But me? I was miserable. Its been months since my last proper meal, my face was thin, my hair was disheveled, and I probably looked like nothing more than a ghost.

Envy, jealousy, a mess of uncontrollable emotions took over me as I pulled out the sword.

The blade was swung down. It was going to kill her. It was going to end that sorrow once and for all. It was going to crush the face of that saint that could believe in and accept everyone.

However, the sword did not cut her. The sword hit the ground instead, breaking itself apart with the impact.

Had she ran away or tried to fight back, I would have definitely killed her.

However Ruthe smiled softly and stretched out her hands, accepting everything that I wanted to throw at her.

Because of that, I hesitated. Just like at the end of that winter when I was twelve years old. When I couldnt inflict my misfortune upon Ruthe This time too

After all Just what was my life about anyways?

Mistakes.

There are only mistakes Abandoning Doll Magic, creating Ruthe, Im sure that there are countless more There is no point in counting, everything was a mistake all along, wasnt it?

The other path The I who chose Doll Magic was spectacular. A decisive woman who took over the world That was the right answer.

In the next time Im born, I hope I can make a better choice.

I held the broken sword once more, put its blade on my neck and cut it. It was so much easier than trying to cut through Ruthe.

Is it because it was about myself? But then Why was I hesitant about Ruthe?

Ah Of course. Its obvious, isnt it? Why did I take so long to realize that?

Its because I and Ruthe are different people. Such an obvious and natural conclusion

If it was now, I think I might have been able to grow closer to Ruthe again, to become friends once more But its too late.

It was snowing, the night was terrible cold And yet, I did not feel the coldness of the wind.

I cant hear anything.

I cant see.

Its over.

***

At first it felt like I was looking at the life of a different Altirea, but at some point, I realized I was united with I. The suffering and the mourning were mine, and the pain from the death that I went through was also something that I felt.

But at least She was now freed from this living hell It was a sweet relief.

Or so I thought. For a second I thought I could feel relief, but it was a false hope, because

Im Ruthe, a transfer student. I may be a commoner, but please take good care of me. She said.

The spring of when I was fifteen years old. Time rewinded, I saw the beginning scene of the original game once more.

However, my movements werent altered by this new knowledge. Seems like only my conscious went back in time, leaving I to suffer again To repeat the tragedy. Over and over again.

There were some differences though. Sometimes it was Elstat that fell in love with Ruthe, at others it was the Wandering Earl, or Phillka, or the other capture targets even

But it was irrelevant. Because in the end, all routes led to the same ending. Altirea Wisp died, her house had its downfall, and her only companion at the end was loneliness.

Over and over again. It was over. It was over. It kept on ending, yet it kept on starting.

For how long did this go on? 100 years? 200 years? I understood that I was breaking down Or was it I that was breaking? I didnt know anymore.

But I could see it I could feel it The days of hard work continuing indefinitely. Her eternal never-ending fate of suffering, being extended time and time again, even past the time where she should finally find some relief.

(This is the fate that the original Altirea Wisp followed. A sad and painful fate. I understand your feelings, I feel the same way.) A voice crawled through my heart. It was sweet, sickening, alluring While listening to it, I was able to forget everything else, (Pity, grief, regret. Those emotions with nowhere to go are swirling inside you. Its regrettable to keep on looking at those lives without doing anything about it, isnt it?

(It doesnt need to be that way. You are not someone that will let things go on like that, right?

(You do not need to worry about this Altirea. Shell be fine. She has mastered Doll Magic and learned Alchemy too. Even if you leave her, shell be able to take care of herself.

(Also, the woman that you saved in the palace was a princess of Malgaroid. Altirea Wisp, Kajero and the Wandering Earl are heroes who saved the capital from a crisis. The fame that Altirea will earn is unprecedented, she will without a doubt be safe now.

(Therefore, its time to go to the next one.

(You who saved Altirea by focusing on Doll Magic since she was seven years old has more work to do.

(The twelve years old Altirea who was tricked by Priest Asksu, the fifteen years old Altirea who reunited with Ruthe, they all deserve happiness.

(Isnt that the mission that you must accomplish?

(Pray for it. Beg for it And I shall teach you a secret technique which will allow you to transcend time and space.)

Whose voice is this?

Why do you know that I and Altirea Wisp are different entities?

I had questions, I wanted answers, but I couldnt think very well. I felt numb

(Whats wrong? Dont hesitate. You should decide now, before I change my mind.) The voice said.

Each time I heard this voice, my mind further melted away. It was harder and harder to think properly, as if anesthesia was being poured directly into my head.

If things kept on going the way they were, I might have abandoned everything, leaving everyone to their own fate.

That alluring voice, I should have noticed that it was the same as Priest Asksus. I should have noticed that I was being manipulated.

However, I did not abandon everyone. I was held back by something.

By the sense of responsibility for what I have done so far. By my bond with Kajero, Walf, Cactus, Feria, dad and everyone else.

And also I was held back, by the cries of the I of this world. The I who should have been merged together with me and melted together into a singular existence.